


The Moon and His Star

by Ncitybae



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Drunk Sex, Fluff, In Love, M/M, Minor Angst, Rimming, Secret Relationship, Smut, Teacher-Student Relationship, im so sorry for this mess, minor power dynamic play, past markhyuck - Freeform, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:15:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 22,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23159158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ncitybae/pseuds/Ncitybae
Summary: Donghyuck needed someone to love him unconditionally.“I only want to be with you.” He assures, cupping Taeil’s jaw. He loved that look in his eyes. Like he was a star, shining brightly in a dimly lit room. “And I hope you feel the same way about me too.”—In which Hyuck falls helplessly in love with someone he shouldn’t. (And Taeil loves him back just as  fiercely.)
Relationships: Kim Jungwoo/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Moon Taeil
Comments: 47
Kudos: 192





	1. Honeysea - Ivoris

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this because I recently got into Hyuckil and realized there’s a lack of fics :(( I'll be writing more for this universe & I’m so sorry if it sucks! feel free to message me on Twitter !
> 
> (Oh and this starts off with smut I’m so sorry)

Hyuck could be annoying, and clingy, and bratty, sure, but for Taeil, he was always obedient. Maybe not _always_ , but lately he'd do just about anything to please him.

So he sat up obediently as soon as he got Taeil's text with a taunting ‘please’ at the end of it. _  
_

_Please_ always meant either one of two things. Either Taeil was long past exhaustion and couldn't handle him being disobedient, or he desperately wanted whatever he was asking for, and Hyuck was hoping it was the latter. 

They'd had sex a few times in the kitchen before but never like _this._ What he was asking for was specific and calculated, and _dirty._

The younger peeled out of Taeil’s favorite band tee and draped it over the back of his rolling desk chair before making his way into the kitchen. He liked that Taeil had assumed he’d still be at his place. 

Hyuck wasn't sure when they'd started hooking up, but he was glad they did. He never would've imagined their softhearted friendship would escalate into this. 

_A burning desire and the most intense hookups of his life._

Taeil was _so_ good at playing the part too. It was something Hyuck had desperately been looking for and Taeil was the first to actually deliver... and be damn good at it too. 

He struggled to climb up onto the island counter and sat back on his haunches, his back straight and his ass out ever so slightly.

_God, he was suddenly cold and uncomfortable._

Taeil had really thought this through.

He considered going back to the comfort of the bed for a while, but then he thought about Taeils _please_ and endured it.

With a sigh he picked up his phone to text him.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Please tell me you'll be home soon.

**Boss**

Are you waiting for me?

  
  


Hyuck smirked.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Of course

**Whiny baby**

You asked me nicely 

**Whiny baby**

Are you going to make me wait here like this all night? 

**Boss**

I might

  
  


Donghyuck moaned at the thought of Taeil ignoring him when he was sitting here, so exposed and ready for him.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

But... I've been waiting for you to get home and touch me all day (｡ŏ﹏ŏ)

  
  


He knows he isn't allowed to touch himself without Taeil’s explicit permission, but he was getting awfully uncomfortable in his current situation. He was cold, and his thighs were already tired from holding himself up.

  
  


**Boss**

Have you now?

  
  


Hyuck smirks.

  
  


**Whiny** **baby**

Oh yes. It's one of my many hobbies.

**Boss**

Tell me more.

**Whiny** **baby**

About what? My hobbies? Or about how I'm hard and my thighs are trembling as I wait for you to get home and fuck me?

**Boss**

Oh baby

**Boss**

Both

**Whiny baby**

My hobbies include astrology, eating macaroni, and rimming

  
  


He chuckles quietly to himself.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

I love it when you look at me, and buy my food, and spank me. I love it when you come home late and fuck me through your exhaustion. I love how you let me stay over, and hold me.

  
  


He bites down on his lower lip. Was that too cheesy? He doesn't give himself time to overthink it before sending.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Are you still busy right now? Are you still tutoring?

**Whiny baby**

Are you thinking about fucking me while helping someone out with their homework? Don't get a boner. He'll think it was him. 

**Whiny baby**

He‘ll think he gave it to you when it was me and you're mine

  
  


Hyuck whined. At least he hoped Taeil was his.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Think about only me. 

  
  


He sent and whimpered pathetically.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Tell me you think about only me

**Whiny baby**

God I'm so hard, can I touch myself? Just a little bit?

**Whiny baby**

Please please please

**Boss**

No. 

**Whiny baby**

I want your hands on me. I want your mouth on me. I want you to get home and touch me immediately. I want you to be as hard as I am right now

**Whiny baby**

I NEED you to get home before I touch myself

**Boss**

Don’t. 

**Boss**

I'll punish you if the counter is dirty. 

**Boss**

Or if you've touched yourself.

**Whiny baby**

Then come touch me 

**Whiny baby**

please

  
  


Donghyuck sucks in a breath and sets his phone down when the door knob jingles with the harsh caress of keys. He can hear Taeil drop his bag down by the door and slip off his shoes and Hyuck closes his eyes, still waiting to be acknowledged.

He waits, and _waits_ through the agonizing silence, but Taeil trails off to the bedroom instead and seems to take his sweet time coming back. 

Hyucks stomach coils in nerves, and anticipation, and desire, and need. 

And then Taeil enters the kitchen and it was all worthwhile.

“How long have you been waiting for me like this?” Taeil's question isn't expecting a response. He knows. “You look so good like this. Waiting for me to come home.” 

Hyuck arches his back and leans forward just enough to brace himself against his palms, perking his ass out when Taeil ghosts a hand down his side.

“We had sex just before I left and you're already this eager to go again?”

He can't explain his intense desire for Taeil’s undivided attention but he's practically shaking, moments away from begging for more.

“What do you want me to do baby?” 

Hyuck whimpers as Taeil begins to trail soft kisses down his back. “Touch me.”

“I'm touching you, aren't I?” Taeil's hand was flat against Hyucks thigh and he moves it to grip loosely at his cock, beginning to stroke him, “Like this?”

Donghyuck whimpers, his hips bucking and his head falling backward in pleasure. “Yes, yes, _yes.”_ he moans, but Taeils hand is off him again before he can even begin to enjoy himself.

“Bend over.” Taeil commands and Donghyuck whimpers and does as he's told, feeling absolutely sinful. His body was already shivering from the cold granite of the island countertop and he knew he looked good naked, but there was something about the way Taeil _desired_ him that drove him absolutely crazy. He was already hard against his stomach. 

The elder runs both palms over Hyucks ass.

“So you like it when I spank you?”

“ _Yes._ ” 

“But you've been such a good boy today.” 

And Hyuck suddenly wishes he'd been disobedient. “Then… reward me.” He manages. In this new position, his head was resting on one of his arms to keep himself from the cold of the countertop and his ass was completely up for Taeil’s disposal.

“Reward you?” Taeil repeated in thought, and Hyuck felt the press of his nose against the swell of his ass before the soft press of his lips. 

_Nevermind._ He took it all back. He enjoyed the praise over everything. 

He nods, hoping Taeil would see it because he currently didn’t trust his voice or any of the words in his current vocabulary. 

“You want me to reward you baby?” Taeil asks again and Donghyuck is forced to answer.

“Yes. Yes _please_.” he moans and Taeil surprises him by smacking his unsuspecting cheek as he sucked a hickey into the other. " _Ah_!” He cries out, the pinch of pain going straight to his dick. He wasn't kidding when he said he loved it. He loved how lewd and vulgar it was. He loved how much trust he put into Taeil and _only_ Taeil.

“How are you so hard when I've hardly even touched you?” Taeil trails his kisses closer and closer to Hyucks puckered entrance. “Were you waiting for me to come home and fuck you all day?”

Donghyuck whimpers through a nod.

Then Taeil rewards him by swiping his tongue over his entrance.

“Oh my _god_.” His eyes shut and his brows furrow.

“Rimming right? You said it was one of your hobbies.” Taeils words are hot against his hole until he suddenly blows a cool stream of air over his spit soaked entrance, the cold air enough to make him shiver and squirm.

“Yes.” He grits through his teeth.

“Then I’ll reward you, baby.” Taeil squeezes his ass one more time before releasing him, “Spread yourself for me.” He orders and Donghyuck does as he’s told, hissing when his warm skin is suddenly flush against the cold granite of the countertop, both of his hands reaching back to spread himself. “You look so good like this.” He mutters before teasingly lapping at his entrance once again, one of his hands covering Hyucks, the other reaching beneath his legs to stroke him idly.

Hyuck rocks back into the feeling. 

Taeil’s so good with his tongue that it shouldn’t be surprising, _but_ _he’s unbelievably good at eating him out._ So good that it manages to take his breath away.

“ _Ah… ah…”_

He tries to imagine what he probably looks like, bent over and fucked out by Taeil’s tongue atop his countertop and his cock visually twitches at the mental image. 

“Should I fuck you, or have you cum like this?” Taeil pulls away, his middle finger circling at his entrance. 

“Fuck me… please.” He screws his eyes shut. And because it was his reward, Taeil complies, pushing his finger past the first ring of muscle. He’d have to be worked open again, since it had been too long since they’d last fucked in the morning. 

Taeil drips lube over his hole and pulls his finger out agonizingly slow to spread it. 

He almost cums twice from how good Taeil is with his hands alone and they never make it to the bedroom. 

  
  
  
  


——

  
  
  


“So who’s the guy?” Jungwoo spoke without so much as looking up from his laptop screen. Donghyuck was definitely surprised to say the least.

“What?”

“Oh come on. You didn’t come home for _three days._ That’s a new record.” He finally looks up at his roommate, one side of his lips turned up in a knowing grin. “And Mark has been heartbroken for like... half the semester now.”

“He has?” Hyuck visibly winces. 

“Yeah.”

He sighs and rubs at the back of his neck. “He caught feelings for _me_ Woo, I swear I didn’t mean to hurt his feelings. No one told him to do that.”

“I’m sure it wasn’t anyone’s fault.” Jungwoos eyes soften, knowing whenever Hyuck was both uncomfortable or at his limit. “But I want to know!” He shuts his laptop and pouts cutely. 

“No.”

“Please! We could go on double dates!”

“No!” Hyuck laughs, “Absolutely not. He's never meeting Lucas. I love you but he—”

“So there is someone?”

Hyuck froze.

_Fuck._

“No, just… forget about it.” Hyuck drops his bag down on the floor and leaves to take a long, hot shower.

  
  
  


——

  
  
  


Sometimes, Hyuck thought bitterly as he stared over at Jungwoo in Lucas’s lap, he really wished he could bring Taeil along to hang out with the rest of his friends. 

Taeil, who never turned him away. Who never refused to hold his hand. Who appreciated his spontaneous pop kisses. 

He sat back on the couch and pulled his phone out to distract himself from Mark’s longing gaze from somewhere across the room. He was trying to act as though it didn’t bother him, but it was pretty damn annoying. 

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Hyung… are you busy rn

**Boss**

Kind of. 

  
  


Donghyuck smiled at how quick he was to respond. 

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Me too. Wanna guess what I’m doing?

**Boss**

Hmm… eating?

  
  


He huffs a laugh.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

I wish

**Whiny baby**

I’m at a party

**Boss**

You say you’re busy but you’re texting me?

**Whiny baby**

Yeah I’m really bored. And my ex is here

**Boss**

Oh

**Whiny baby**

Yeah he keeps glancing at me. I wish you were here with me instead (;_:)

  
  


He sighs when Taeil takes longer than usual to respond.

  
  


**Boss**

I wish you were here with me too

**Whiny baby**

I’d hold your hand if you were here. Would you let me?

**Boss**

Of course. 

**Whiny baby**

God, now I want to hold your hand TWICE as bad

  
  


He looks up around the room and realizes he'd totally been left out of their conversation. 

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Would it be so bad if you met my friends? :(

**Boss**

You know I can’t 

  
  


He sighs, already having anticipated that response.

  
  


**Boss**

But you can come over after if you want

  
  


He perks up and looks around at the unsuspecting room.

  
  


**Whiny baby**

Can I go over now?

**Boss**

I’ll leave the door unlocked

  
  


-

  
  


It didn’t take long for Donghyuck to muster up a half assed excuse and high tail it out of there. (Was it Johnny’s apartment? It was probably Johnnys.) 

No one even questioned him, since he’d been pretty spaced out the entire evening. 

And sure enough, Taeil had left the door unlocked just like he’d promised and he let himself in, surprised to find him on the couch instead of in his bedroom.

“You weren’t kidding about being busy.” Donghyuck sighs.

“Yeah, sorry.” Taeil glances up and shoots him a apologetically crooked grin.

“I didn’t know you wore glasses.”

“It’s better for grading papers.”

Hyuck drops his bag of clothes down by the door and walks over to sit beside him, wrapping himself around one of Taeils arms. “You said I could hold your hand but they both look pretty busy.” He pouts.

“I can take a break.” Taeil holds up one of his hands and Donghyuck watches it for a second before slipping his fingers between the spaces, lacing their fingers together and bringing it up to his lips, pressing a kiss to every one of Taeil‘s knuckles. 

“Would you really let me do this in public?”

“Why don’t you hurry up and graduate and find out?”

He whines, “Because... that’ll take too long…” 

“Sorry.” Taeil suddenly sighs, “I know being with me isn’t… ideal.”

“No!” Hyuck sits upright, “It’s fine, really. It just sucks that I can’t drag you along with me everywhere and sit in your lap and show you off and stuff.” He frowns and watches the look on Taeils face soften. “I only want to be with you anyway.” He assures, and brings his free hand up to cup Taeil’s jaw. He loved that look in his eyes. Like he was a star, shining brightly in a dimly lit room. “I hope you feel the same about me too.”

“I do.” Taeil finishes for him softly and Hyuck wants to scream at how in love he must look. 

He leans in and presses a gentle kiss to the corner of Taeils lips. “You should probably get back to work now.”

“Probably. You’re a powerful distraction.” He chuckles. 

Hyuck sighs and moves to lay his head in his lap instead, Taeil pushing his laptop further toward his knees to allow him more space. 

“Is this okay?”

Taeil nods, running his fingers through his hair before going back to his paperwork.

-

“Baby.”

Hyuck forces himself awake, reaching up to rub at his tired eyes. 

“Lets go to bed.”

He nods wordlessly and forces himself up. Taeil follows closely behind him, pressing a hand to his lower back.

With a soft kiss to his cheek, they go their separate ways. Hyuck stripping out of his clothes on the way to the bed, only tripping once over his jeans, before falling over and waiting for Taeil to come back. 

Taeil joins him a while later, his body fresh from a shower, and ready for sleep. 

“Back.”

Hyuck sits up once the door shuts behind him. “Did you want to–?” He reaches up and wraps his arms around Taeils neck once he’s close enough.

“No, it’s late.” Taeil shakes his head, pressing a minty kiss to his lips. “Did you brush your teeth?”

“No,” Hyuck groans and releases him, falling back onto the bed, “I’m too tired.”

Taeil chuckles, “But you need to brush your teeth.” He tugs on his hand lightly. “I won’t kiss you until you brush them.”

“Then… brush them for me?” 

And Taeil laughs even harder, “You’re impossible.” He shakes his head but leaves for the restroom.

He comes back a moment later and climbs up onto the bed, straddling Donghyuck’s waist this time to get a better angle. “Open.”

Hyuck stares up at him in disbelief, “You know you’re like… fulfilling one of my longest lasting childhood fantasies right now, right?”

Taeil laughs again. “Open.”

So he does and Taeil brushes his teeth with unexpected care. 

“You still have to get up to spit this out, you know.” He smirks and Hyuck groans.

Taeil tugs him up and they end up in the bathroom, Hyuck rinsing out his mouth and then turning to wrap his arms around Taeils neck. They share a few more slow, mint laced kisses.

“Was this a flaw in your fantasy?”

“Definitely.” He groans, pressing his face into Taeils neck. “Carry me?”

“You’re the _biggest_ baby.” Taeil rolls his eyes but hikes Donghyuck up higher when he wraps his legs around Taeil’s waist in one swift movement. 

They fall into bed together. Legs tangling, arms wrapping, caressing, and holding. “How early do you have to be up tomorrow?” 

“Pretty early. I promised Jae I’d get breakfast with him in the morning.”

“Nooo.” Hyuck whines, pressing pop kisses down his neck. 

“Sorry. Maybe if I’d known you were coming over...”

Donghyuck whines and Taeil pulls him impossibly closer. 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to write more for this universe & I wasn’t gonna post it for that reason but I figured I could always just make it chaptered ! So here it is. Let me know what you think, or if you have any ideas, PLZ message me on twt,,, I have no Hyuckil friends ;^; 


	2. I don't know you - the marias

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> chapter titles shall be relevant songs (you don't have to listen)

Hyuck hated his sociology class. 

He enjoyed the concept, and the lectures, and maybe even the professor, he just wasn’t fond of all the damn essays.

Sue him for being lazy. 

“ _Jungwoo!”_ He cried out miserably as soon as he heard the front door click shut. He shoved the laptop off his lap and opened up his door to peek out into their shared apartment. “Oh.”

Lucas stood in the hallway, looking guilty. 

“It’s just you.”

He’d frozen with his hand halfway to Jungwoo's doorknob, his ears an angry shade of red. 

“What’s up?” Hyuck pushed his door the rest of the way open and casually crossed his arms across his chest, leaning against the door frame. 

“Uh…” Lucas rubbed nervously at the back of his neck, “I just forgot my gym bag.”

Right. Of course he did. They might as well just move in together, he thought bitterly to himself, knowing they both wanted to. But Jungwoo was always both too stubborn and too afraid of leaving him alone. The thought was both bittersweet and sometimes a little overwhelming.

“Sorry if I bothered you.”

“Dude. No, it’s fine. I was just bored.” He was so bored right now that he’d settle for talking to a goddamn bedpost.

Lucas shoved open Jungwoo’s bedroom door and came back with a Nike strap over his shoulder.

“Anyways. Did you ever take sociology?” 

Lucas pursed his lips in thought and shook his head, “No, I took psychology. It was for the same credit.”

“Right.” He nods. “Did you like it?”

“Yeah! It was really easy.”

Hyuck groans.

They had to do an essay on what they _thought_ sociology was going to be, an essay on the first chapter, then another on the second chapter, and that was just within this first week and a half. 

“I just hate writing so many essays...” He groaned and pressed his forehead up against the doorframe. 

Lucas shrugged. “Just drop the class then.”

“I can do that?” He straightened.

“Yeah?” the elder chuckled, “I drop a class almost every semester.”

“You do...?” his brows furrowed in confusion. He’d never dropped a class before. The thought hadn't even occurred to him.

“Usually it doesn’t affect you if you drop within like... the first week or something.”

His jaw drops. 

And that day, Lucas planted a seed in his head. 

So when he found out they’d be doing essays like this _every week_ , he threw his bag right over his shoulder (no matter how rude he probably looked) and walked out. 

_It was a lot of work,_ he rationalized with himself. 

_But… he would miss the class._

He sighed.

_But the school would refund him anyway!_

_-_

He walked out of his disappointed academic advisor’s office that day feeling a little bit better about his workload. 

The problem was that it was too late to _add_ any more classes, and the gap there was... impractical. It didn’t give him nearly enough time to go to the gym, or eat, or get much of anything else done because of how close it was to his other classes, so he did something stupid. 

He kept attending class. 

It’s not like anyone would notice, with how many people were crammed into the lecture hall.

But he still sat close enough to answer a good amount of questions because he couldn't help that he was an extrovert and he didn't like the long pauses that lingered between a question being asked and their class hesitating to answer. 

They were all mostly based on introspection and social observation anyway, but he still kept up with their readings too, since he'd already bought the book after all.

It was an interesting subject and he loved to learn.

And a few weeks into this routine, he began to feel a little like he was hiding in plain sight. 

\--

“Hey.”

Hyuck looked up at the kid who often sat beside him. 

“Can I borrow a pen?”

He nodded and shuffled around in his backpack till he found his favorite gel ink pen. “I need it back though.”

“Yeah, no problem.” The boy grins, “I honestly wasn’t sure if you’d have one. Since, you know, you never take notes or anything.”

Hyuck had to stifle his laughter. “I honestly dropped this class.” He lowered his voice down to whisper and figured he could trust this guy. He hadn’t told anyone other than Jungwoo, and he looked harmless enough.

“You–? What! And you still show up?” ‘Mark’ asked, looking up at him in confusion. He had scrawled his name messily on the sign-in sheet that was always passed around before and after class.

“It’s interesting.” He shrugged. And it was. He liked exploring the function of human society. Professor Moon used a lot of real life examples and it had become one of his favorite classes. Possibly because he didn’t have to do any of the actual coursework.

“Yeah, until you have to do like a million essays a week.”

Donghyuck chuckled, nodding along in agreement, and their class began shortly after. 

And of course he forgot to get his stupid pen back... on a Friday of all days.

-

Mark showed up to class looking all kinds of disheveled the next time their class met. His hair was messy and his eyes were hooded and Hyuck found it difficult to stay mad at him. 

“Are you okay?” He asked, raising a brow just as Mark dropped down in the seat beside him.

“Yeah, I’m just really tired. There was this party at my friend's place last night and I didn’t remember we had an essay due at midnight.” He groaned miserably, “And I somehow managed to finish it all in like ten minutes.”

Donghyuck shook his head, “Should’ve just dropped.”

“But then I never would’ve gotten to steal your fancy pen.”

Hyucks jaw dropped and Mark laughed a little obnoxiously, setting the pen down in front of him.

“I’m just kidding! Sorry I took it. I owe you lunch or something.”

“Yeah.” Hyuck shoves the pen deep inside his bag and rolls his eyes playfully. He could never say no to free food. “Sure. When are you free?”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


After a few weeks of attending classes, Donghyuck realized that professor Moon was an all-around amazing teacher. 

He never seemed to raise his voice or get visibly annoyed when his students didn't know the basic concepts, and the things he noticed about society and culture made Donghyuck curious to know more about the type of person he was. He found that he had so many questions for someone so smart. He wondered how he would answer certain questions he had about the world or society, what his thought process was like, and if he could hold an actual conversation without sounding so… professional. 

Was that the word for it?

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“So, how’s this week's essay coming along?” Hyuck teased Mark, peeling the wrapper from around his greasy burger. They'd come to some crappy burger place just outside of campus and the first bite had Hyuck thinking maybe this place wasn't so bad after all. 

“Don't remind me.” Mark shook his head, “It's good right?”

He nodded, not expecting the burst of flavor. “ _Really_ good.” 

“So what's your major?”

“History, with a focus on government.” He recited.

“Wow.” Mark nodded along cluelessly, “Did you want to be a teacher?”

“ _No.”_ he narrowed his eyes at him, reaching for a fry and shoving into his mouth to keep from chucking it at Mark Lee’s head, “A government historian probably. Or maybe a historical consultant.” He had bigger plans.

“Nice. I'm going into accounting.”

_Boring,_ Donghyuck thought, careful to keep his snappy opinion to himself. “Nice.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Professor Moon had once jokingly talked about how teachers appreciated when students visited their conference hour a lot more than they let on. He'd joked about how he wouldn't mind if someone decided to stop by with a plateful of donuts and that's how Donghyuck ended up outside of his office with a box full of many, _many_ calories.

He knocked, and thankfully no one had beat him to his favorite professor's office yet. 

Moon Taeil was quite popular among the students for being friendly, and the fact that he was handsome was definitely somewhat of a bonus. 

His eyes widened at the sight of the box and Hyuck was grinning smugly. 

He placed it on his desk, opened the box, and sat back in one of the cushioned seats.

“I—that was a joke.” His professor looked up at him with a soft amused look in his eyes. 

“So you don't want them?”

“Well if you went through all this trouble.” He hooked a finger into a corner of the box and dragged it closer to himself to get a better look. “What did you want? An A?” He looked back up at Donghyuck to catch the surprised look in his eyes, “Because I've honestly been curious as to why you still attend my class after you dropped it.”

Hyuck's face turned, what he could only assume, was a guilty shade of pink. Or maybe an awestruck shade of white. 

“Glazed are my favorite.” Moon smiled offhandedly and picked up the only glazed donut in the box. Hyuck had gotten a variety of donuts and flavors, in case his professor was into something weird. “Donut for your thoughts?” He glanced back up at Hyuck and smiled at him warmly, sliding over the box.

He honestly hadn't been expecting this. He figured he could give Mark's name instead of his own if it came down to it, but he wasn't expecting _this_. “I’m sorry.” he bowed apologetically.

His professor shrugged, “Don't be. I’m sure you had your reasons.”

He picked out a chocolate donut for himself and took a nervous bite. He was being way too easy on him.

“But that makes me more curious as to why you still attend.”

“Well, uhh—I liked your class… no, I _like_ your class _,_ but I'm taking a bunch of other classes right now and the amount of essays was kind of overwhelming.” he could feel himself blushing in embarrassment.

“In my defense.” Moon spoke, smiling encouragingly, “They were supposed to be summaries. Short summaries actually. I wasn't counting off for grammar or formatting.” he shrugged, “I mentioned that a few times, but I have a feeling you have a hard time accepting anything other than perfection. I remember your essays. You're an exceptional writer.”

Hyuck could feel the pride welling up in his chest. 

“Anyway, I'm getting off-topic, you came to talk to me about something, right?”

“I really liked your class. Sorry, I still do, and I hope you don't mind that I still attend.”

“Of course not.” He smiled again, “It’s nice to have someone in class who actually tries to use their brain for once.”

Hyuck snorts. He had to put a hand up to his mouth to keep from embarrassing himself.

“Don't tell anyone I said that.” He shot him a playfully threatening look, and Donghyuck was glad he'd come to see him, “Let me guess, you're majoring in history or literature.”

His eyes visibly widened. “How did you know?” 

“In your, ‘what I think Sociology is going to be’ _summary._ ” he stressed the word summary for good measure, “You went into detailed history about what our civilization previously accomplished and compared it to the language and interactions we have today. Very researched for a summary. And as much as I find it interesting, I'm not sure the class would prefer to learn about the history of interactions over the present.”

“I find it interesting.”

“I wish more of my students had your mind. Minus the thought to drop my class.”

Donghyuck laughed this time. 

“I like forcing people to write because it gives me a look into their narratives. You're comfortable with history so that's what you wrote about.”

Hyuck stared at him in mild awe and disbelief.

“I wish we could’ve had this conversation before you dropped my class, we could’ve probably worked something out.” he was reaching for his bag beneath the desk and standing. ”I have a class soon,” Donghyuck didn't even realize they were a few minutes passed the allotted conference time. He should've come sooner. “I expect to see you at my next lecture?”

He sat up. “Yes sir.”

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone's staying safe.
> 
> Feel free to message me on twt.


	3. Affection - BETWEEN FRIENDS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Also markhyuck warning 4 this chapter ((:

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not proof read, this is not proof read, I'm so sorry

“I just wanted to quickly go over my expectations for the summaries again.” Professor Moon dropped his bags down on the long table by the lecture podium and pulled out his laptop. 

Hyuck watched and waited. He sounded very serious. 

“When I said I wanted weekly summaries, I meant _summaries._ I didn’t expect essays, I just want to know what you thought about the readings. Please note that I won’t be grading it harshly. It can be anything you want to say, as long as it pertains to the main topics discussed in the chapter. Half a page. No need for formatting. I just want my assignments to be easy enough for you to get through in one sitting.”

Hyuck leant back against his seat with a smug grin pulling at both corners of his lips. **_YOU'RE ALL WELCOME_** he wanted to yell. 

He saw the sag of relief in a few of his peers and he bitterly wished he was still registered for this class like the rest of them. 

Professor Moon had already admitted to liking his writing (and his mind). This class would’ve been a piece of cake. 

Hyuck sighed. 

He _could_ just retake the class next semester. 

_Yeah, he’d do that, he decided._

Once class was over, he took his time getting up like he usually did, waiting for the last student to ask Professor Moon a question before approaching him.

"Oh." His expressions softened when he saw it was Hyuck. “Be honest, do you think I’m asking for too much? I haven't been teaching long, maybe I'm asking for too much.”

“No, it's not too much.” Hyuck scoffed in disbelief, “You better not let them get to you, you hear me? You’re an amazing professor.”

“Says the student who dropped my class.”

Hyuck paused, shocked for a moment before recovering, “But I always come back, don’t I?”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“You look good.” Jungwoo walked over to ruffle Hyucks hair.

“Hey!” But he slapped his hand away before he could reach him, “You say that like I don’t _always_ look this good.”

“You're right.” Jungwoo smiled fondly with a gentle sigh, "Then I take it back."

Hyuck was wearing a white button-up shirt tucked into some nicely fitting jeans and a black belt to contrast. If there was one thing he was good at, it was throwing together casual outfits. He’d even smudged some of Jungwoos eyeshadow onto his eyelids. He looked _good_ and he knew.

“Who are you all dressed up for?” Jungwoo grinned, already knowing. 

“You’re so mean,” He pretended to pout, “How ever did you turn down such a _man_?” Donghyuck pretended to fan himself at the thought of Doyoung, otherwise known as his upperclassmen crush. 

“He’s not really my type.” Jungwoo shrugged. Doyoung used to come over all the time just to spend time with Jungwoo and Hyuck would always lock himself in his room to avoid running into him. At times, he was just too much to look at. They would study a lot, and Hyuck had never anticipated being _more_ attracted to someone with their glasses on.

“We get it, you’re into… idiot himbos?”

Jungwoo glared at him.

“I’m kidding!” He put his hands up in surrender when Jungwoo drew a hand back to smack him.

“I liked Lucas for lots of reasons. Doyoung liked me, but Lucas was always in _love_ with me.” His smile softened as he spoke, “We were both really childish and immature, I guess, but he always took good care of me. And he still does.”

"I know." Hyuck pulled his best friend into a fierce hug suddenly, “You're too cute. Stop rubbing your perfect relationship in my face.” He joked and buried his face deeper in the younger's neck, “I'm literally so happy for you though... I’m gonna cry and I’m not even drunk yet.”

Jungwoo chuckled, “Well, better go change that.”

-

Jungwoo linked their arms and held him close as he went around introducing people to Donghyuck. “ _T_ _his is my little brother_.” He would introduce, and Hyuck just went along with it. And _Mark_ was there, of all people. But surprisingly enough he’d grown quite fond of him. He’d even go as far as to consider him one of his closest friends beside Jungwoo at this point. (And yes, that was partially a reflection of his loneliness.)

So when Lucas arrived and tried to pull Jungwoo away (who was hesitant to leave Donghyuk by himself), he walked back over to where Mark was sitting and dropped down on the couch beside him. 

He knew Jungwoo just didn’t want him third wheeling or alone, but he was more than capable of making his own friends. 

“I didn’t know you had an older brother!” Mark bumped into his shoulder playfully. 

“I don’t.” Hyuck snatched the cup from Mark's hand and drank the rest of whatever gross liquid he’d been sipping, “He’s my roommate. He started late so he’s way older than me. _And god, that was disgusting.”_ He cringed and threw the empty cup in Mark's direction. 

"Yeah," he somehow managed to catch it, “but I felt bad not finishing it.”

Hyuck huffed, “Good, then I don’t owe you. But come with me and I’ll make you another one...” 

Mark cringed.

“A better one.” He assured and stood up, pouting when Mark sank back into the couch cushions, pretending to be asleep, “Come on! I promise it’ll be good. I was a bartender.” He grabbed one of his hands and attempted to haul him up.

“You were?”

“Yeah. My parents owned a bar and I used to pick up shifts back in highschool.”

“Isn’t that like... against the law?”

“Are _you_ gonna rat me out?”

Mark grinned and allowed Donghyuck to pull him up. “Why’d you stop?”

He shrugged, “I didn’t like working.” _And all the older men always hitting on me._

Mark finally gave in and they made their way to the kitchen together. He caught a glimpse of Johnny sitting with Jungwoo and Lucas at the dining table with a few of their other friends, but still no sign of Doyoung. 

He sighed.

Maybe it was a sign. And sure, he said that about everything, but maybe he just needed to loosen up before Doyoung arrived.

“Let’s play never-have-I-ever.” Hyuck suggested, knowing Mark would _hate_ it. Sure enough he was making a face. “Come on!” He grabbed his hand and pulled him along behind him.

The kitchen was littered with bottles of sujo and liquor and he knew it wouldn’t take very long to get them drunk. 

“Shots.” He found a few shot glasses and rinsed them out, setting them down up on the counter and filling each one of them to the brim before turning back to Mark, “Here, I'll start with an easy one. Never have I ever… cheated on a test.”

Mark's jaw dropped when Hyuck folded down one of his fingers.

“You’ve _cheated?”_

“How have you _not_? Not even in elementary school?” He gawked, “I swear you make me want to drink.” He carefully picked up the shot glasses and motioned for Mark to follow him with the alcohol. “Do you guys want to play never-have-I-ever?”

Everyone looked up at him as he set the glasses down on the dining room table.

Jungwoo’s eyes glistened mischievously and he was in. 

Johnny nodded, “Sure.”

And Lucas had no choice. 

“Thank God, because Mark hasn't done _a single thing."_

They laughed and he looked over at the younger, blushing through a gentle shake of his head.

_-_

Two rounds later and he somehow ended up on the couch in Jungwoos lap, a whining, slurring mess. 

Who knew Jungwoo had done so much?

Who knew Jungwoo had done THAT many things.

He looked too innocent to be telling the truth.

And Lucas sure as hell hadn't known about it either.

“Hyuckie, we’re gonna take off, are you ready to go?” Jungwoo cupped the younger's face, trying to get him to look at him straight.

“No…” Hyuck shook his head in confusion. He couldn’t remember exactly why, but he knew he wasn’t ready to go just yet.

“But I don’t want to leave you here like this.”

“I can watch him,” Johnny assured. “I’ll make sure he stays the night.”

“Thanks.” Jungwoo smiled, then Lucas helped shift Hyuck into a more comfortable position on his own so they could leave. “I’ll see you soon.” 

He waved, sad to see them go, “Please don’t have sex on our couch again.”

And the two of them choked and there was gentle laughter and then footsteps. Hyuck already had his eyes closed.

Wow, Johnny was such a good sport. The best guy.

“I’ll be right back.” Johnny ruffled his hair and got up to walk the couple out of his apartment. 

“Oh hey.” Hyucks eyes fluttered open after hearing motion. He forgot Mark was even here, but he was happy to see a familiar face. “Come here.” He reached out and dragged him down, wrapped his arms around him when Mark sank down on the couch beside him, “I missed you, where did you go?”

“The restroom?” Mark said it like he probably told him before he left and Hyuck took it as a pretty good indicator that he was probably much drunker than he thought. 

He nodded in dismissal, scared that he would embarrass himself if he opened his mouth again.

Was Mark drunk?

He thought Mark was pretty drunk.

He couldn’t quite remember anymore.

But he definitely wouldn’t forget that Mark was the one to lean in first and kiss him flush on the lips. 

They parted and Donghyuck couldn’t help that his eyes had fluttered shut, his lips parting in a silent gasp. “Mark—“ he breathed the word quietly between them, “No, I don’t want to date you.” He shook his head, “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Mark shrugged, and he said it so easily that Hyuck had to believe him. “It’s fine, we don’t have to be like that.”

“But I don’t want you to like me. I don’t want us to _not_ be friends, you know?” He hoped Mark knew. He was too drunk to know if he was making any sense or not.

“I know. I won’t. Pinky promise.” Mark held up his pinky finger between them and Hyuck squinted down at it before wrapping his pinky tightly around Marks. Definitely drunk, because that didn't really solve anything. But it felt like it did. “There. See? Now it’s fine, see...” And Mark whispered it so softly that Hyuck forgot it was even him. It was just some stranger whispering sweet nothings into his ear. It was just some stranger nibbling at his earlobe and kissing tentatively at his lips and dragging him to a nearby bedroom that hopefully wasn’t Johnny's.

Oh it was a bathroom.

God it was dark and blurry but Donghyuck wasn’t the type to forget the things he did in the dark when he was drunk. He could even recall the particularly sharp pain in his ass after tripping and falling back onto the restroom's tile floor. Mark locked the door behind them and dropped down onto his knees to join him and they made out on the floor, eventually settling for messy handjobs and pulling down some of the towels to lay their heads on and fall asleep with. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Donghyuck got to class extra early on Friday and sat in the very front row where he knew no one else would be sitting. 

He couldn’t look Mark in the eye. Not yet. 

But the lecture was so interesting that for a second he was able to forget about the entire encounter. 

Messy handjobs and all. 

-

“You missed class on Wednesday.” Professor Moon called out to him once they were alone again after lecture, just as he was packing up his things. “Sometimes, I worry I'll scare you off.”

“You already did that successfully before I dropped the class, remember?” He joked, but grinned proudly after seeing him smile, “I just wasn’t feeling well.” He lied. 

“Well, I’m glad you're feeling better. Class is always more interesting with you here.”

And he wanted to shoot back one of his usual comebacks, but he figured jokingly telling Professor Moon that he was what made _this class_ interesting would be entirely unprofessional.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry, it's kinda short,, will write more soon I just felt like this was a good place to end this chapter. Also here's my [twt](https://twitter.com/ncitybaee)


	4. better friends - BETWEEN FRIENDS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Updates are pretty short but at least I’m somewhat consistent <3

Donghyuck was _not_ pleased. He had the most unflattering bruise on his butt and the weirdest night of his life. 

“I can’t believe you lied to me.” He muttered, walking out into their shared living room.

Jungwoo screamed, dropping the chicken nugget he was holding and covering both his eyes with the palms of his hands. “You’re _naked!”_ He was sitting on the couch having a Harry Potter movie marathon with Lucas, who’d just left to bring back some more nuggets. 

“So? I’ve seen you naked before.”

“You have?” He tilted his head to one side, still shielding his eyes.

“Yeah, remember Christmas?”

“Oh yeah…” he cringed. “I wish I didn’t. But I don’t want to see _you_ naked!”

“Ouch. Look, I just came to confront you about this, because this is your fault, so open your eyes.”

“No! Why should I?”

“Because you said Doyoung was going to be there _and he wasn’t!”_

“You still got laid, didn’t you?”

“DON'T remind me.”

The doorknob jingled and Lucas walked in right in the middle of their conversation. “Oh.” He looked away immediately, “Should I give you guys a minute?”

“No!” Jungwoo still hadn’t uncovered his eyes. 

“Look at this bruise.”

Lucas looked and, “Oh my— _god,_ that looks awful!” He even stepped a little closer to get a better look.

“I know.” Hyuck rolled his eyes, ”Look at it Jungwoo.”

“No!” He shrieked. “ _I’m not looking!”_

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck hated that things had changed between him and Mark. They’d pinky promised, but another week had passed and he still couldn’t look him in the eyes. 

He was one of his first real friends here after all, and now he tried to avoid him like the plague. 

He’d get to class extra early just to minimize the chances of seeing him out in the hallway and he’d usually linger to be the last person in class to walk Professor Moon to his next class anyway, but it kind of hurt that he’d lost a friend. 

Maybe he just had attachment issues.

“Are you going out this weekend? Gonna party?”

Professor Moon laughed with a shake of his head, “Not this weekend. I’ve got papers to grade.”

“ _This_ weekend? So you go out?”

“Sometimes. Doesn’t everyone?”

Donghyuck thought of himself, and how unless it was with friends, he’d rather stay locked away in his bedroom to study. But... maybe he just studied too much. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

Professor Moon pushed open the door and held it open for him. “You seem a little down lately.”

Hyuck looked up at him. “I stopped talking to a friend of mine recently.” He admitted.

“Oh no.” He frowned.

Hyuck sighed. “I don’t even know who’s fault it is.”

“Have you talked to him about it?”

He shook his head no.

“If you miss him this much then maybe the relationship is worth saving.”

Hyuck turned the thought over in his head. Was it worth saving? “How do you know if someone is worth fighting for?” He asked, looking over at his professor, who was smiling at him encouragingly.

“If you’d rather not live without them, I’d say they’re pretty worth it.”

So Hyuck _didn’t_ talk to Mark. 

He missed him, but he’d rather suffer in silence than risk having to confront him about that night in Johnny's bathroom. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


At around three in the morning, after reading into the history of communism and watching half a documentary on it, there was a loud knock on his door. 

Hyuck jumped at the harshness of it and set his book down on the coffee table with a huff.

He was almost positive Jungwoo was staying the night with Lucas, and sure enough it wasn’t Jungwoo waiting outside. 

It was Mark, leaning against the doorframe, looking drunker than ever.

“Can we talk?” He looked up at Donghyuck with the saddest eyes. And _wow_ it suddenly made him feel like a complete asshole for ignoring him.

He nodded and Mark ran his fingers through the front of his hair, straightening up when Hyuck took a step back and pulled the door open further to allow him inside. 

“ _I’m sorry._ ” He suddenly broke down as soon as Hyuck shut and locked the door behind them, “I’m sorry if I ruined everything.” He brought both hands up to cover his face, “And I’m sorry if you hate me, I’m sorry... I know it was all my fault. That night—I shouldn’t have—“ he hiccuped.

Donghyuck sighed, making his way over to Mark and guiding him toward the couch by his shoulder blades. “Mark.” He finally spoke, turning Mark around and pulling his hands down from his face. He was a sobbing mess, his lashes wet and his nose dripping. “It’s okay.”

“It’s not.” He pulled his wrists out of Hyucks hold and went back to wiping desperately at his eyes, “I messed everything up. You don’t sit with me anymore Hyuckie, _I’m so sorry_.”

He’d never used that nickname with him before and it must’ve been the alcohol talking, but Hyuck still found it endearing. He liked being babied. 

“You won’t talk to me, you won’t look at me…” he inhaled sharply, “And I miss you... _so much._ I just want to be your friend again.”

And Hyuck had to pull him into a hug this time. Maybe he was worth it. Maybe he came here tonight just to prove it. “It’s okay. We can be friends again.” He assured and pulled away only once Mark had stopped crying. He sat down on the couch and pulled the elder down with him.

“Can I stay?” Mark wrapped his arms around Hyucks waist without asking and buried his nose in the crook of the younger's neck.

“Sure.” Hyuck sighed, and he settled for watching the rest of the historical documentary with a passed out drunk on his chest.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


**Markymark**

Plz sit next to me in class today :(

**HyUGHck**

I’ll think about it

**Markymark**

PLEASE :(((((((

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck sat in his usual seat up next to Mark and he tried not to think about how Professor Moon looked around for him in the crowded lecture hall, even going as far as to pause on him once their eyes met. 

He smiled softly and started back up with the lecture. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“We talked it out.” Hyuck was approaching Professor Moon just as he was packing up his things.

“I was wondering why you’d suddenly switched seats.”

“You thought it was to be closer to you?” He jokingly cocked a brow and Professor Moon huffed a laugh, “He came to me though. So... I guess I didn’t think he was worth it.”

“Well, there could also be other reasons. Like pride. Or maybe the type of person you are.” Professor Moon finally hiked his bag up onto his shoulder and they walked toward the exit together.

“What kind of person do you think I am?” He beat his professor to the door this time and held it open for him a little too eagerly. 

“A quiet intellect with a heart of gold.”

Donghyuck laughed. He actually laughed so hard his head fell backward, “What does that even _mean?”_

Moon looked pleased with himself and the fact that he’d managed to amuse Hyuck. “You’re introspective and curious and you like to learn, but I only know that after getting to know you. You’re also very kind.”

Hyuck smiled. “You think so?” He didn’t expect the compliment to warm his cheeks and feel so personal.

“You just held the door open for me!”

“That's true.”

They both shared a quiet laugh this time and Hyuck felt lighter than he had in a long time. 

  
  
  
  
  



	5. 12:34 AM - Billy Lemos, Maxwell Young, Omar Apollo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minor momentary time skip. (Into the future!!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A much needed break from the drama. For now.

“I really shouldn't be here…” 

“Oh come on, _Professor Moon,_ who’s gonna report you for sneaking up into my bedroom at this time?” Hyuck teased, lowering his voice and running a hand up the elders chest to rile him up. He'd climbed up through the fire escape in his work attire, looking entirely too good in business casual. 

“ _Anyone_ could’ve seen me.” He looked nervous.

Hyuck wasn't. “Did it excite you?” He teased, cocking a brow. He could care less. He wrapped his arms loosely around Taeils neck and pulled him into a gentle kiss, their lips melting sweetly in the middle. 

Finals had taken a lot out of both of them.

“Are you ready for the grand tour?” He pushed Taeil away suddenly with a cheeky grin and pulled him further into his bedroom, firmly clasping his hand. It would be Taeil’s first time in he and Jungwoo's shared apartment afterall.

Taeil nodded, already looking around and taking in Donghyuck’s mostly organized bedroom. 

He’d made sure to clean up for tonight, meaning most of his usual messes were out of sight. 

He was guilty of leaving the occasional bag of chips on his bed, or piling books onto his nightstand, and his desk was _absolutely_ _always_ a mess of sticky notes and writing utensils and wrappers.

He was _usually_ a mess, in other words, but he was working on it. 

“This is nice.”

“You don‘t...” Hyuck averted his eyes and resisted the urge to playfully roll his eyes, or crack a joke. Because he cared. He cared a lot more about Taeil's opinion than he was used to caring about anyone. 

“I’m serious.” Taeil squeezed his hand and it was hard to suppress his knee jerk reaction of diverting the attention away from himself. It was impossible, with Taeil wanting to know everything about him and his heart finally willing to let someone in. “It’s very you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He could feel a smile tugging at his lips.

“Books and… cute bed sheets.” Taeil smiled and Hyuck scoffed, looking away to hide his blooming blush. “It’s better than my first apartment.”

“Really?”

“Definitely.” Taeil squeezed his hand again. 

Hyuck couldn’t help but lean forward and press his forehead shyly to Taeil's shoulder. He always knew how to reassure him. He guided the elders hand to his waist and he held him there, exactly where he needed him. “I’m really glad you came tonight.” He made sure to whisper. He needed him to know how much this meant to him. How much _he_ meant to him, when they were so scarcely granted the opportunity to be together lately. 

Hyuck only straightened to press a lingering kiss to Taeil’s lips. 

And Taeil only pulled away when they both began to get a little too carried away. “House tour.” He reminded, and he loved the way Hyuck's eyes lit up, his cheeks rosy and his lips glistening. 

“Right!” He rolled just eyes, “I didn't clean the kitchen for us to fuck before we even get there.” He tugged Taeil along by the hand.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“Is it weird to be friends with your professor?” Hyuck suddenly asked.

“Kind of.” Jungwoo didn’t look up from his bowl of cereal, “Unless you’re trying to sleep with him.”

“I’m not!” Donghyuck looked up at him, scandalized. 

“I'm not judging.” Jungwoo looked up in turn with a sly grin.

“I don't think you _can_ judge,” Donghyuck looked back down into his own bowl of cereal. “After that never-have-I-ever.”

Jungwoo laughed, covering his mouth with a hand.

“What did Lucas say?”

“He was too drunk to remember.”

“Well, _lucky you_.”

Jungwoo snickered again, “Just be careful, okay?” His voice was gentle as always, but his tone was suddenly serious, “Remember that older people are just people with more experience. They can have sick intentions too.”

“Woo…”

“Power play can really... _escalate_.”

“Sounds sexy.” Donghyuck joked, “But I already _told you_ I don't want to sleep with him. It's not like that.”

Jungwoo looked unconvinced. “Just be careful. You're young and pretty, Hyuckie. Don't let anyone take advantage of you.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“I was gonna cook you something, but it's kind of late anyway.”

“I already ate.” 

“Oh, good.” He turned and wrapped his arms around the elder’s neck again, “Because I can't cook for shit.” he admitted.

The elder laughed and Hyuck kissed the smile from his face, desperate to have him closer, pressing their bodies together and ushering Taeil further back toward the couch. He was a needy mess of hormones and Taeil was happy to indulge him. 

“Tell me how much you missed me.” Hyuck pulled away to mutter, pushing Taeil back onto the couch. “And take your shirt off.” He'd him beg if he had to, but Taeil obeyed. 

“I couldn't stop thinking about you.” Their eyes remained locked and Hyuck was strangely aroused by the way he unbuttoned his work shirt. “I even missed the way you tease me all the time.” Taeil grinned and Hyuck smiled softlt, the shirt easily slipping off Taeil’s shoulders and onto the floor in an instant. 

He couldn't help it. He dropped down onto Taeil's lap and straddled him, only allowing the elder access to his neck. 

“Tell me more.”

“I thought about you in the shower last night.” Taeil muttered against his wet skin, pressing open mouth kisses down the length of his neck, “And again this morning.”

Hyuck moaned lewdly, grinding down against the growing bulge in Taeil's slacks beneath him. 

He could feel Taeil's hands on his thighs, the warmth of his skin beneath his palms.

“I already prepped myself.” He admitted, and he could _feel_ Taeil’s praising and approving grin, with his lips still pressed against the underside of his jaw.

“No wonder you’re eager.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he pulled away.

“Just that… we didn’t make it to the kitchen.”

Hyuck laughed and his head falling back and his arms droped from around Taeils neck. 

“Should we go see it?”

“No!” Hyuck laughed at how adorable Taeil could be, “We have all night. We can fuck again in the kitchen after this if you want.”

“You’re _too much_.” Taeil chucked, his hands reaching and grabbing lightly at Donghyucks ass. 

“You can grope me harder if you want.” He assured, leaning over and biting lightly at Taeil’s earlobe, “I can handle it.”

And then suddenly both hands were squeezing him harder in an instant when the door suddenly swung open.

“ _Oh.”_

“Shit!” Hyuck jumped up and stumbled off of Taeil’s lap. 

He landed ungracefully onto the couch beside him, grateful they still had their pants on. 

He clutched at his chest, his heart _pounding._

“You said you were staying over with Lucas tonight.” Hyuck finally spoke and broke the silence, a little more accusatory than he’d been expecting.

“I—“ Jungwoos eyes were locked on Taeil, who was looking shamefully down into his lap. “I forgot my book bag.” He suddenly snapped out of it and shut the door behind himself, walking briskly to his bedroom and returning with the damn bag slung over his shoulder, “Sorry to interrupt.” He spoke softly and left without another word.

Hyuck could still feel his heart pounding and Taeil still hadn't looked up yet. “I'm sorry I—I swear he won’t...”

“I should probably go.”

_"No."_

  
Taeil stood up and Hyuck followed, taking his hand.

He picked up Taeils shirt and led them both to his bedroom, shutting and locking the door behind him. “Jungwoo’s like my brother. And he’s done worse things, he wouldn’t tell anyone.” He tried to reassure Taeil in the darkness of his bedroom. “Please stay.”

“I didn’t really want to leave.” Taeil admitted, and he wrapped his arms around the younger's waist when Hyuck approached him, their racing hearts finally calming.

He’d deal with Jungwoo later, Hyuck thought, already dreading the conversation.

Taeil held him in his bed that night until they finally stripped from their clothing completely, Hyuck climbing back atop Taeil once more.

“Can I ride you?” He whispered, pressing his nose against his moon’s cheek.

Taeil nodded in response and it only took a few good strokes to get him going.

A few moments later the little bottle of lube was shoved back beneath the pillow and he was easily slipping inside Hyuck once he was coated and dripping in lubricant.

_“Fuck…”_

They’d missed each other far too much to part ways that night.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I blame animal crossing for my lack of updates.


	6. Mai - Videoclub

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sort of a filler chapter. Sorry. Million thanks to my [BETA](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ctrl_vmin) <3 who got me through my momentary writer's block!! ILYYYYY 
> 
> (mentions of drunk sex, but nothing too graphic)

Professor Moon let out class immediately after everyone signed the attendance sheet.

“Are you feeling okay?” Hyuck asked his professor before leaning over to sign in, even if his signature wasn't necessary.  _ Favorite student~  _ he signed at the bottom.

Professor Moon shook his head, “This class is just ahead of schedule and I didn’t feel like lecturing today.”   
  


“Oh,” Hyuck pouted. “Then I’ll try not to be  _ too _ disappointed that my favorite professor canceled class today.” 

“I still owe you a donut? I can treat you to one, if you also have nothing better to do.”

“You owe me an entire box.” He reminded.

His professor laughed and nodded in earnest agreement.

Hyuck had  _ never  _ been one to turn down free food and this was no exception. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck had never skipped class before, so it was a little unnerving to walk down the empty hallways. 

“I had pretty high hopes for what you might’ve written for your signature assignment.”

“I can still do it, if you want me to.” Hyuck pulled absentmindedly at his backpack straps. Everywhere was mostly deserted, since classes were still in session.

“No,” Professor Moon shook his head, “You have other classes you need to worry about.”

“But I can handle it.”   
  


Moon shot him a deadpan look.

“I’m doing it.”   
  


“You’re…. seriously _ too  _ much!”

Hyuck shot him an offended look and his professor laughed again. 

“Just tell me what you might’ve written about.”

“Probably...” Hyuck paused. “Either The Construction of Gender and Sexuality, or Social Inequality.” He nodded to himself, “I liked learning about how we make our own concepts of masculinity. And also that I’ll probably never be a wealthy businessman.”

“You never know.”

“Oh, _I_ _know_.” Hyuck laughed at the thought. 

Outside was surprisingly warmer than he’d been expecting. They walked to the campus coffee shop, picked up two donuts, and from there decided to walk around together. 

He didn’t mention that he’d be missing his next class shortly. 

“So, you said you haven’t been teaching long.” 

“Yeah, it’s only my third year.”

“ _ Third?”  _

His professor nodded.

“I really thought this was your first, or maybe your second year. You seriously look so young.”

He chuckled, “I’m twenty-nine, but I’m flattered.”

_ So they were only about five years apart.  _ “How did you start working so soon?”

Professor Moon sighed, “I always knew I wanted to teach, so I took a lot of advanced classes during and after high school. I finished off my military service, finished my certification, and started working.”

Hyuck nodded along and took the first bite of his donut. He made it sound so easy. Sometimes he wished he had that much of a drive.

“I didn’t want to rely on anyone and it worked out pretty well for me.”

“Is there anything you regret?”

His professor looked over at him, bit down on his lower lip in thought, and sighed, “I’m the youngest in our department. So I don't  _ regret  _ anything, but sometimes, I wish things were a little more interesting. I wish I’d had more fun when I had the chance.”

“It’s never too late.” But Hyuck couldn’t imagine being surrounded by older men every day. Every gathering, every department meeting.

“I mean, it’s not like I don’t have any friends. Jaehyun is teaching psychology and we graduated together, but his parents worked for the university... so it was a little easier for him.”

“Social stratification.” Donghyuck shook his head and rolled his eyes in an exaggerated gesture of exasperation.

“Exactly,” Moon huffed a laugh in amusement.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“Come on…” 

Jungwoo wouldn't leave Donghyuck alone tonight but he finally finished his research paper, he was on the fourth season of my hero academia, and the last thing he wanted to do was get up off the couch right now.

“I don’t feel like going. Especially after you  _ lied to me  _ last time.”

“I’m sorry.” Jungwoo pouted, “But this time Doyoung’s going to be there _for_ _sure_ and it'll be fun, Hyuckie! I promised Johnny I’d bring you.”

“Well then break your promise.” Hyuck narrowed his eyes at his roommate and sighed when it became glaringly obvious that Jungwoo wasn’t moving from in front of their living room tv. 

“Come on, let’s get you dressed up and sexy!” Jungwoo grabbed his wrist and began to pull. 

He groaned in protest but eventually allowed himself to be hauled up and led to their kitchen. “What are we doing here?” He asked as Jungwoo rummaged around inside one of the cabinets below the sink. He pulled out a questionable bottle of…  _ what was probably alcohol,  _ and set it down on the counter top. 

“We’re pregaming. Duh.”

“Oh,  _ duh,  _ of course.” he rolled his eyes. Like he was supposed to know where Jungwoo hid his liquor.

“We’re gonna have a great time.” Jungwoo pulled two cups out of the cupboard and filled them with said mysterious liquid, “You’re gonna get laid,  _ I’m  _ gonna get laid, and it’s gonna be great.” He handed a cup to Hyuck. “Sound good?”

He cringed at the tmi. “It’s not like I have a choice.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Sure enough Doyoung was there, sitting next to Mark on the couch, looking uncomfortable in a large group of people. 

Maybe that's why he hadn’t come the last time. 

“He  _ came _ !” Jungwoo had his arms around Hyucks waist, “Against his will probably. But he came.” He pressed a kiss to Hyucks cheek and finally released him.

Hyuck was already pretty loosened up from the pregaming they’d done back in their apartment, but he wasn’t nearly as drunk as the rest of them.

“You’ve gotta catch up!” Mark motioned him over and poured him a shot.

He tried not to look in Doyoung’s direction as he made his way toward them. He sat up on the arm of the couch beside Mark.

“Hey… you’re Jungwoo’s roommate!” Doyoung pointed up at him and an adorable smile adorned his features.

“Yeah, I’m surprised you still remember me.” He looked away to hide the flush of his cheeks.

“Are you kidding? You made me dinner that one time!”

Mark looked up at him, handing him the shot, “Oh, you did?”

Hyuck quickly downed it and tried to play it off, “I made  _ ramen _ , and it was for  _ both of us _ .” He reminded, teasingly narrowing his eyes at the handsome elder, “But maybe I did feel bad that Jungwoo fell asleep on you and we didn’t have anything else to eat.”

“Oh, so you guys really know each other?”

“Not really.” Hyuck shrugged. 

“Let’s get to know each other then.” Doyoung raised his glass and Mark followed.

He couldn’t recall the last time he drank as much as he did that night. 

It was all a faded blur, but he did vaguely remember Doyoung’s head thrown back in laughter. His Adam's apple bobbing in the column of his throat. His pale skin. His dark hair. 

And Mark's hand absentmindedly ending up on his thigh at one point in the night.

Jungwoo eventually returned with Lucas and everyone kept laughing at the couple pretending to fight over who’s beer Jungwoo had been sipping. Johnny nealy fell to the floor laughing, and Donghyuck knew that Jungwoo was good at entertaining people, but he really outdid himself whenever they were all together like this. 

It was no wonder he encouraged him to come out tonight. The energy was exhilarating. 

Hyuck definitely made a fool of himself too, but they would all be too drunk to remember it tomorrow anyways.

Then, before he knew it, he was being taken back to his apartment on Lucas’ broad back with Jungwoo trailing closely behind them. 

“I don’t wanna leave.” He whined in a slur, but the couple ignored him. He wasn’t sick, but he wasn’t coordinated enough to make the walk down to their apartment alone, and he refused to get up until Lucas scooped him up off the couch and threw him right over his shoulder.

He could’ve sworn he was just on the couch beside Doyoung... with his pouty lips, and his expensive sweater, and his soft looking hair.

“Hyuckie, I’m gonna stay with Lucas tonight.” Jungwoo pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before he could protest and pulled the blanket up further to tuck him in. “Don’t leave, okay? I’m leaving the trash can by your bed, in case you get sick.”

Donghyuck nodded, but the peace and quiet that followed the silent click of the front door didn’t last long.

There was a knock... just as he was beginning to fall asleep, and he was entirely too drunk to be pissed at the fact that it woke him.

Hyuck pushed the blankets off himself and struggled to stand up, making his way unsteadily to unlock the front door.

“What did you forget?” He pushed the door open, squeezing himself partially through the doorway. 

“I, uh–“ 

Hyuck was surprised to find Mark standing there instead. “What are you doing here?”

“I just...”

Hyuck couldn’t think. Not really… and certainly not  _ rationally,  _ but he was trying _.  _ “What?”

“Is it cool if I hang with you tonight?”

“Why?” Hyuck chuckled, “Is your roommate getting it on?” He drunkenly slurred and pulled him inside.

“If you're tired, I can just sleep here.” Mark pointed down at the couch.

“No, let’s do something.” Hyuck rubbed at his eyes in exhaustion. But there was nothing left to do. Nothing left to drink.

“Last time…” Mark cringed, like it physically pained him to talk about this, “We did stuff, and I was… kind of wondering if you wanted to hook up again.”

Hyuck took a moment to collect his thoughts. “Wait...” he really wished he was sober right now. His confused mind was struggling to keep up, “I mean... I guess if you want to. But you better keep your promise this time.” He held out his pinky and felt himself coming to life with the prospect of getting laid tonight. “ _ Just _ friends Mark. I’m so serious right now.”

“Just friends,” Mark repeated, wrapping his pinky around Hyuck’s for the second time.

And he knew it was a bad idea. “But this time,” he leaned in closer so that hopefully only Mark would hear, as if they weren't currently alone in his apartment,  _ “I want you to fuck me _ .” he bit down on his lower lip.

“I-I can do that.” The elder nodded and Hyuck pulled him toward his bedroom.

It’s not that he was settling for Mark. His drunk mind could hardly even process that he'd wanted to hook up with Doyoung earlier in the night, but as he reacquainted himself with Mark’s mouth, he could hardly tell who was touching him. 

  
  
  
  



	7. Wishful Thinking - BENEE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> best beta for encouraging me to post <3 uwu

  
  


“You’ve topped before, right?” Hyuck pushed Mark off of himself to ask. He wasn’t so bad to make out with, but he didn’t quite hold him right.

The elder looked like a very confused deer caught in the headlights. “I haven’t really… been with guys.”

“Oh,” Hyuck sighed, “I don’t know how we managed the first time…” He shook his head, “But look, I’ll teach you.” He pushed Mark further off of himself and rolled them over to straddle him.

“Uh—okay.” 

“I’ll do most of the work. Just hold me here.” He set both of Mark’s hands firmly on his waist, “ _Hard.”_

“Are you sure?”

“ _Harder!”_

  
  


_-_

  
  


Hyuck, by no means, was a virgin. He’d always been gay, always been out, and _always_ had options. So sure, Mark was inexperienced and practically a virgin, but a part of Hyuck liked the challenge. He loved the drama of being used. He loved the thrill of Mark experimenting and learning new things about himself as they fucked just before Jungwoo got back from class. 

It wasn’t ideal, but it was practical. And Hyuck loved that Mark wasn’t complicated. He was just… Mark. Always.

He was constant, and there were few things Donghyuck liked more than stability. 

If he accidentally stayed the night, he was gone by morning.

If he took too long to respond, Mark never took it personally. 

He also knew that it was a little sadistic to enjoy their situation, but he didn’t _care_. He was getting laid and he didn’t have to clock in emotionally.

“What are you doing? _Hyuck_ —“ 

Hyuck was pulling the blanket away from Mark and slowly but surely kicking him off the bed. 

“ _Dude!_ ”

“I want the bed to myself...” He whined, and Mark reached out to grab him but toppled over the edge and onto the floor in a mess of limbs before he could catch himself.

“Dude…” Mark muttered miserably from the floor this time, “We _just_ finished.”

“So?”

He sighed, “I don’t really feel like... walking to my dorm right now.”

“Well,” Hyuck pulled the blankets tighter around himself and hummed at the freedom to finally spread his legs, “You can stay over if you want… just not on my bed.”

Mark groaned from where he was sprawled out naked on the floor. “But won’t Jungwoo find it weird if he sees me on the couch?”

“Why? He knows we’re having sex.”

_“He what?”_ Mark sat up so fast his voice cracked and Hyuck would’ve made fun of him if he wasn’t so exhausted.

“He’s my best friend Mark, of course he knows.”

“Oh.” Mark ran a hand through his hair, “Right.” He nodded and laid back down. 

“Plus, It’s been _weeks_ and we’re not exactly as lowkey as you think.” He chuckled.

“He’s heard us?”

“ _Oh_ _yeah_.”

“Oh god, that’s so embarrassing.”

“Look, I’m not gonna kick you out, but I’m going to sleep.”

“Right, sorry. Goodnight.”

Hyuck could’ve probably made him feel better by mentioning all the times he himself had been kept awake before Lucas got his own apartment, but he immediately fell asleep instead, and Mark slept pretty soundly on the floor that night.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“Why are you so mean to him?” Jungwoo laughed, a grin playing on his lips in amusement. Before Lucas, Jungwoo had had his fair share of hookups too, so a part of him understood.

“I don’t know. I think it’s our dynamic.” Hyuck was messing with the sticky rice Jungwoo had made for dinner, pushing it around on his plate to distract himself.

“What’s wrong? Why are you making that face?”

“You sound like my mom.” He rolled his eyes with a chuckle.

“If something’s wrong you can tell me,” Jungwoo said, in his casual tone of voice. Not prying, but definitely curious.

Hyuck knew Jungwoo well enough to know that he would’ve let it go if he just denied it again, but he sighed, “Like... me and Mark are just friends who sleep together, right? But how do you go back from that?” 

Jungwoo watched him, waiting for him to explain himself like he didn’t quite understand yet.

“Like… let’s say I like someone.”

Jungwoos eyes widened.

“I’m not saying I do! But if I did.” He groaned in frustration, “It’s—” He sighed again, “Complicated, don’t ask, because I’m positive it’s not happening, but how do we go back to being just friends?”

Jungwoo watched him in silent contemplation. 

“It’s not like we’ve ever had _feelings_ for each other, but it’s kind of weird thinking about how much he knows about me. You know… sexually. About my body—“

“I got that.”

“I feel like…” he took a deep breath, closing his eyes, “now I get why people say this is a bad idea. Why didn’t you tell me this was a bad idea?” He opened his eyes to Jungwoo stuffing his face. 

“Would you have listened to me?” He muttered through a mouthful of rice. 

“No.”

“ _Then?!_ ” Jungwoo laughed.

Hyuck shoved his shoulder. 

“So, what's your crush like?”

Hyuck cringed because as much as he _didn’t_ want to talk about the hopeless crush he had on his professor, he did. He’d been dying to tell someone. “He…” he sighed, “He’s really nice.”

Jungwoo raised a brow.

“Sorry, that was terrible.” Hyuck laughed, “But he’s just a normal guy. He just...“ Hyuck stopped himself, “Are you sure you want to hear this? It’s kind of pathetic.”

Jungwoo shrugged. 

“I feel like most people in the past have started liking me for my looks, and that’s fine, but that’s also why I hate relationships so much. Because if you like me for my looks…” Hyuck paused to collect his thoughts, “Then what’s the point of even trying?” He looked back up at his best friend with a soft shake of his head, “I think about this too much, but if someone likes me for my looks then they don’t really like me for me, and I’d rather _not_ try to impress them. Yet the closer I get to this guy, _who probably doesn’t even like_ _me…_ ” Hyuck sighed. ”He changes my mind. He doesn’t care that I’m annoying and bratty and I _really_ hate that I’m romanticizing him because he’s genuinely a _good_ guy, but I think I’d really like it if he wanted to date me back. Like, I’ve started to think about it a lot more, and it’s kind of become something that I want. Seriously”

He glanced back up at Jungwoo who looked equal parts shocked and confused.

“More than getting laid.” He clarified with a huff and glanced back down at his plate, “He’s a really nice guy. And even if nothing comes from this, he helped me learn a lot about myself.”

Jungwoo nodded, “if you’re serious about him… Mark will understand.”

Hyuck chuckled suddenly, reaching over to pinch Jungwoos cheek, “You’re so cute, you know that?”

The problem wasn’t his crush. The problem was confronting Mark about it at all when his specialty was avoiding and burying his problems. He didn’t want to talk to Mark about it _ever, a_ nd he didn’t want to sleep with Mark anymore while figuring it out. 

Jungwoo pushed his hand away, “I know.”

Talking to Taeil made him realize that deep down he wanted something more, something serious, and it definitely wasn’t going to be with Mark Lee.


	8. Erase - Omar Apollo

“Good morning.”

Taeil looked up from his laptop and smiled up at his favorite student. 

He’d begun to enjoy Hyuck’s presence so much that he would be disappointed if the younger didn’t stop by during his conference hour. He would wait for him after class, walk him downstairs to his next class, and sometimes even invite him out to eat. 

Taeil had never expected to get so close to one of his students, but Donghyuck was always the exception. He was even a little sad that the semester was nearing its end. 

“Are you busy?”

“Of course not, come in,” He motioned for Hyuck to sit down in one of the seats across his and physically moved away from his computer screen. Even if Hyucks weekly visits cost him valuable grading time, he’d gladly put in the extra work at home. Hyuck made him smile without fail every week. Before class, after class, and occasionally even during.

“I wrote this, since you insisted.” Hyuck pulled the signature assignment essay out of his backpack and set it down on Taeil’s desk. 

The elder reached over to receive it.

“This isn’t due for another two weeks.” he looked back up at Hyuck in disbelief.

“Yeah,” The younger smiled, “You think I’d wait that long? I’m hurt.” He dramatically clutched at his chest.

Taeil chuckled, “You’re unbelievable.” He took the packet in his hands and skimmed over the title page. _The Self Construction of Manhood and Sexuality._ “Would it offend you if I told you I was impressed?”

“Very much so, yes.” Hyuck nodded jokingly.

“Well,” Taeil laughed at his dramatics, “you always impress me, but I guess I’ll hold back on the compliment this time.”

“Nevermind, I take it back. I’ll take the compliment.” 

Taeil laughed again. “Okay, okay,” he obliged. “I’m impressed. And I’m interested to see your thoughts on this topic.” He flipped open to the first page. 

“I actually have something to ask you.” Hyuck looked down at his bag and to try and calm his rugged breathing before his heart jumped right out of his chest. 

“Yes?”

“Do you like me?” Hyuck looked back up at his professor. 

Taeil couldn’t decipher the look in his eyes. The younger’s expression was completely straight and entirely serious, “— _yes?”_ He muttered without thinking, and it came out sounding more like a question than it did an answer.

“Usually people don’t ask if someone likes them because they’re scared of rejection, but I think I’ll be okay if it’s from you. The semester is ending soon anyway.” Hyuck spoke like he was nearing the end of his thesis, “I’ll blame it on my personality type.” He finished with a sheepish grin and watched Taeil’s expression closely. The crease of his brow, the concerning press of his lips. It wasn’t promising. “Do you like me? Have you ever considered me romantically?” Hyuck had planned out this conversation so meticulously in his head that there was no outcome he hadn’t come prepared for. He _needed_ to know. Even if in the back of his mind, he knew. 

“Donghyuck.” Taeil flipped back to the title page of his essay and set it down beside him. His posture seemed suddenly rigid. “You’re—like one of my students.”

Hyuck turned away suddenly and smiled. He understood. He got his answer. 

“I like you… _as a student_.” 

“Thank you, Professor.” Hyuck stood up from his seat and turned to leave his office for the last time, pausing before opening the door and turning around to bow to him, deeply and respectfully. “I hope my essay is to your standard. ” He straightened back up and left. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“Oh my god, Hyuck.” Jungwoo gasped and froze on the way to his bedroom. All the lights were off in their shared apartment but Donghyuck’s sniffling ultimately gave him away, “Are you…” he paused and motioned for Lucas to wait for him in his bedroom, “Are you okay? What happened?” He muttered only after the door had shut behind his boyfriend. 

Hyuck sniffled again but didn’t respond. He wasn’t usually a crier. He’d just expected that Jungwoo would stay over at his boyfriend’s tonight. 

“I’m guessing… it didn’t go well.”

“ _I already told you,_ it wasn’t happening." He snapped, his tone uncharacteristically harsh. He hadn’t meant to come off so defensive, but he was practically shaking with emotion. He’d cry it out and be over it by tomorrow.

“We can talk about it, if you want.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” He assured him, and Jungwoo left to his room without another word. 

Hyuck would be fine. 

Moon Taeil was the one that didn’t deserve this. 

He didn’t break Hyuck’s heart, he just happened to be the first to get to it. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Doyoung still didn’t go to many of their functions, but Hyuck was grateful to see the elder at this particular hang out. He was in need of a good distraction.

The only thing interesting enough to pull him out of his depression right now was a new challenge, and Doyoung, sitting alone on the couch at this party, seemed like the perfect opportunity.

“Hyuck!” His Hyung smiled in relief to see him.

“Hi, Hyung.” He smiled and bowed as he approached him. “I brought you a drink.” 

“Oh…” Doyoung didn’t seem too enthusiastic about receiving it. “I actually didn’t want to drink tonight,” He confessed and set it down on the coffee table, “but thank you.”

Hyuck nodded, figuring he’d drink it himself once he was done with his own anyway. He’d rather not leave here tonight sober. “Random question, but what did you think of me before we got to know each other?” He smiled coyly to play off the nerves twisting around in his gut.

“Back when?”

“When you used to tutor Jungwoo.”

“Oh…” Doyoung paused to think it over, humming and tapping a finger against his knee in thought. “I thought you were cute. Very, _very_ cute.” he assured with a gentle smile, like he might compliment any other dongsaeng.

“So you’d never seriously consider me?”

Doyoung’s eyes widened ever so slightly, “Like… to date?”

Hyuck crossed his slender legs. He knew he was attractive, and funny, and apparently very _very_ cute, but whatever crush he’d had on Doyoung was strictly physical. “Not really.” He shrugged.

“Then…?” The elder raised an inquisitive brow.

“Back when you wanted to sleep with Jungwoo, I was kind of jealous you never considered me.”

Doyoung looked at a loss for words, his ears turning a brighter shade red. Even if Doyoung was beginning to see him differently, as _just_ a dongsaeng, he’d risk it all to get laid tonight in a heartbeat. It wasn’t a rational thought, but he was _bored,_ and he’d been sad for days now.

“This party’s kind of boring.” He muttered. 

And he must've looked damn good because the elder eyed him, agreed, and they made their way downstairs together.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck shot Jungwoo a heads up text and just like that, they were alone in Doyoungs apartment. 

The elder locked the door behind them and Hyuck got up on the tips of his toes to reach him, cupping both of his cheeks and pulling him into their first official kiss. 

_It felt so good to get what he wanted._

Their kiss was desperate, with both of them seemingly hungry for human affection, and Doyoung was a lot more experienced than Mark had been. Hyuck could tell almost immediately. 

He was good with his lips and, surprisingly, even _better_ with his hands. 

He moaned against his mouth and Hyuck tugged the elder's lower lip between his teeth, dropping to his knees right there in the entryway.

“Oh, wait— _ahh_ ,” Doyoung moaned again when Donghyuck began to palm him through the fabric of his jeans. He still remembered the longing he’d felt, wishing Doyoung would notice him back when he would visit their shared apartment, and now he was quite literally getting what he wanted.

Even this small victory was enough to make him feel better. 

He unbuckled Doyoungs belt and successfully pulled both his pants and boxers down in one swift movement. “Holy _shit_.” He gasped, taking Doyoung’s half hard member by the base in one hand. “I didn’t think you’d be this big.” He admitted, pressing Doyoungs cock against his cheek before beginning to stroke him.

Doyoung’s head fell back against the wall and he moaned when Hyuck ran his tongue up the underside of his shaft. 

He couldn't get enough of the sounds Doyoung was making. His breathy whispers, his pleading moans. It was doing wonders for his wounded self-esteem when just hours ago he’d felt empty. 

_“Fuck, Hyuck,”_ Doyoung whimpered _. “Fuck...”_ he moaned. 

Sex he could do. At least this, he knew he was good at. 

_“Wait… shit..."_

Regardless of his size, he had no problem taking Doyoung down his throat.

He was a writhing mess suddenly above him, desperately running his fingers through Hyuck’s hair and gripping him _hard_ to guide him. 

And Hyuck didn’t know why, but something instantaneously made him angry. Maybe it was the fleeting thought that he'd still had to be the one to approach him, but it seemed to light a fire within him. 

He braced his hands behind Doyoung‘s thighs and began to work at him with newfound vigor. 

The elder was moaning, begging for him to wait, but he _needed_ to please him. 

Hyuck swallowed around his length and allowed himself to be manhandled to his very limit, ignoring the tears in his eyes and the drool dripping down his chin. 

“I’m gonna cum.” Doyoung cried, still abusing his scalp in the best possible way. 

Hyuck tightened his grip around his thighs and released them in silent reassurance for him to do so.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


He was _exhausted_ the next morning _,_ but Hyuck still managed to wake himself up early enough to make a silent escape. Doyoung was thankfully tangled up in the bedsheets facing the opposite direction, entirely unsuspecting of his dongsaeng scrambling around for his clothes at dawn before the sun came up. 

The only thing he couldn’t seem to find was his underwear.

He gave up and snuck out of Doyoung’s apartment anyway to make the long trek back to his own place, feeling unsteady on his feet but a whole lot better about himself. 

He just wished he could’ve found his damn underwear. 

He was positive, knowing his luck, that he’d probably worn something particularly embarrassing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> many, many thanks to my wonderful, amazing, Pisces soulmate beta


	9. Homage - Mild High Club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY chapter 9.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks again to my beta

Donghyuck’s essay was, unsurprisingly enough, brilliant. It was thought-provoking, researched, and he’d expected no less from such an exceptional student, but it was also exactly what Taeil had been looking for in an end of course assessment.

_ And then there was the letter _ , attached to the very last page, addressed to only him. 

_ “Professor Moon, you’ve taught me a lot about myself this semester. I get it now. It takes really getting to know someone first to make a bond between two people so powerful. Even if whatever we had ends here, with this shitty ten page essay, thank you for everything. Thank you for being a part of my learning and growing experience.  _

_ Your favorite student. H.” _

He smiled fondly, despite himself. 

He stared at the unsent email he’d typed up on his laptop and weighed over his options. 

**I’d like to see you in my office, at my next immediate conference hour if possible.**

His cruiser hovered over the send button as he considered it. He didn’t want to act as if nothing happened, but if Hyuck was just _confused_ about his feelings, then _… would he be taking advantage of an impressionable student_? He had to put his feelings aside because that was the last thing he’d wanted to do.

He sent the email, regardless of any doubts he still had in his mind because he was an adult. He could keep things professional.

He sighed, setting down Donghyuck’s letter. He hoped that the younger would at least indulge him. Hyuck wasn’t even in his class anymore to receive the proper credit he deserved. 

A week had passed and the younger had yet to skip class, but he no longer jumped in to answer questions and he always left when class ended since their final conversation. 

Taeil hated how much that bothered him. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


For three days Hyuck dreamt of his night with Doyoung like some horny, recurring nightmare. It was only particularly haunting because he couldn’t bring himself to respond to his string of text messages yet and the unknown number was still taunting him in the notification bar every time he checked. 

He wasn’t exactly avoiding him, he just wasn't sure what he was going to say just yet. Did he expect an explanation? Was he going to ask  _ why _ he threw himself at Doyoung the other night?

Because if he was good at one thing, it was avoiding his problems, and this had slowly but surely become a problem. 

Hyuck sighed, finally slipping the phone from his pocket and glancing over the messages he hadn’t opened yet.

**(xxx)xxx-xxxx**

**It’s Doyoung I got your number from Jungwoo.**

**Are you okay?**

**I didn’t make you uncomfortable did I?**

**I’m sorry.**

**I feel so bad Hyuck, please respond.**

**I talked to Jungwoo but he doesn’t know what’s going on. I didn’t tell him we slept together, I’m not sure if you want anyone to know, but I’m worried.**

**I’m really sorry Hyuck**

**Please answer soon**

He suddenly felt bad for not responding and considered sending some lame attempt at an apology before settling for something simple. 

sorry, I’ve b een busy

He wasn't looking for anything serious or another meaningless arrangement like the one he’d had with Mark. No matter how attracted he was to Doyoung, he didn’t want to think about pursuing anyone else after what happened last time. But he’d already ignored Doyoung for the past few days and unnecessarily dragged him further into this mess. 

The elder responded almost immediately. 

**(xxx)xxx-xxxx**

**For three days?**

He smiled down at the message. What else was there to say? Sorry again?

“No phones please.”

Hyuck’s head shot up and he was glad he wasn’t the type to be easily embarrassed by being called out in public. “My bad.” He smiled tightly up at his professor just as the phone began to buzz again in his lap. He not-so-subtly glanced back down the message.

**(xxx)xxx-xxxx**

**Can we talk?**

He stood up, threw his bag over his shoulder, and left the lecture hall as his Professor carried on with the lecture.

-your place or mine?

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Doyoung’s apartment, thankfully, wasn’t too far off campus. He knocked after texting him that he was outside and waited.

“Hyuck.” Doyoung stared at him, looking all kinds of nervous before finally stepping aside to allow him in. “I was kind of worried that… maybe I’d crossed a line the other night.”

“Hyung,” He shook his head, “I’m the one who came on to you, remember?”

He still looked entirely too nervous. 

“I  _ fully  _ consented to what we did so it’s fine.”

“But you were drinking.”

“Hardly.” He huffed a laugh, “I didn’t even finish my drink before you dragged me out of there.”

Doyoung‘s ears turned a burning shade of red, “But you left really early... and then you weren’t responding.” He muttered. 

“That doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy it.” Doyoung was surprisingly fun to poke fun at and he'd been desperate for another distraction.

“That’s what it usually means.” He looked at him with gentle eyes, like he wasn’t exactly sure how well the conversation was going.

“Well, I liked it.” Hyuck assured. “And I’d do it again, if you were wondering.”

Doyoung still looked unsure of himself and Hyuck found the shy side of his personality quite charming. He was different somehow in the daytime. Definitely less confident, even in the confines of his own apartment, where he was more likely to be the most comfortable.

Maybe Doyoung just didn’t approach him  _ because  _ of his confidence. 

“You would?” He finally muttered.

“Yes. And you should be more confident, Hyung, you’re very sexy.”

Doyoung huffed a laugh in embarrassment this time and brought a hand up to cover his blushing face. 

“Seriously.” Hyuck smiled and tilted his head to one side. He read somewhere that when someone tilts their head to the side, they either like you, like what you're talking about, or both. 

And in this case, it was  _ definitely _ both. He liked every aspect of being desired.

Doyoung remained frozen and Hyuck ultimately had to be the one to reach out and make the first move again, pulling the hand from Doyoung’s face and leaning the rest the way up to kiss him. He felt a lot better about it this time. 

He realized that day that his Hyung was a lot more gentle in the daytime. 

He was more hesitant, more careful, and Hyuck almost wished they could go back.

  
  


-

  
  
  
  


Hyuck was finally beginning to feel like things were slowly but surely going back to normal.

**Doyoungie Hyung**

**We need to talk**

Hyuck shoved the phone back in his pocket and made his way out of the lecture hall, not surprised to hear his professor calling him back. 

“Donghyuck!”

He paused in the entryway and considered running out before reluctantly making his way back toward the podium.

“Did you get my email?”

He nodded. Most of his peers were already gone, but a few of them were still loitering around by the exits. 

“Can you come to my next conference period?”

He was a little thrown by his professor's formal tone of voice. “I'd rather not.” He smiled at him tightly. He had no idea what he wanted, but the last thing he needed right now was to be referred to their school’s guidance counselor. He was an adult. And his issues had nothing to do with his feelings. 

“Please. I’d really like to talk to you.”

Hyuck didn’t know what he was  _ still  _ doing here, but other than being late to his next class, he couldn’t think of any other excuse to bolt. “I like you, Professor.  _ I had a crush on you, _ and I hope you understand that I think it’s a little awkward to come see you after confessing.”

Professor Moon swallowed, cautiously glancing behind them before continuing.

“Please.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck sighed. They were once again alone in his office and Hyuck would rather be _anywhere_ else right now. 

“I like you too.” Professor Moon started off, suddenly clearing his throat and capturing his undivided attention. “I realize it now. It doesn’t change the fact that you’re still strictly my student, but I figured you deserved to know.”

Hyuck stared up at him in silent disbelief.

“I wanted to use your essay as an example for future reference on how to write my signature assignments. I’ll hide your name and identity, but I wanted to ask you in person.” He finished and opened up his laptop like he hadn’t just confessed to liking him back.

Hyuck finally nodded after a beat of prolonged silence, realizing that his professor wasn't planning on looking back up at him. And for the first time in his life, he couldn't think up something to say. “That’s fine. Is that all?”

His professor nodded, “I’ll email you the details.” He fleetingly glanced up at him in acknowledgment and promptly redirected his attention back to his screen in dismissal. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Hyuck felt hornier than ever standing outside Doyoung’s apartment that night. He was only available pretty late because of his classes, but Doyoung assured him that wouldn't be a problem, and he was sorely reminded of the last time they’d been together this late into the night. 

He clutched at the straps of his backpack and knocked again, surprised when the elder answered looking angry. Maybe even furious.

“Is everything... okay?” He cleared his throat, wishing he wasn’t so damn hard right now _._ Given the context, it suddenly didn’t seem so appropriate. He’d never seen Doyoung like this before. 

He stepped wordlessly aside and waited for Hyuck to enter before speaking, “You’re sleeping with Mark.” He accused, only once they were both alone in the comfort of his apartment. 

Donghyuck felt his stomach drop. “I was, yeah.”

“No. You’re  _ still  _ sleeping with Mark.” He emphasized and Donghyuck was once again overwhelmed by the malice in his tone. 

He realized he hadn’t exactly clarified or ended things with Mark yet. “Did Jungwoo tell you?”

Doyoung’s brows furrowed further in anger, “You left your fucking  _ underwear  _ and Mark found them.” His words were as sharp as a slap to the face.

Hyuck swallowed. He was suddenly so overwhelmed that he had to physically resist the urge to run. He had to remind himself that dealing with his problems was just a consequence of his actions. 

Doyoung pointed and he followed his gaze to the wrinkled pair of briefs sitting guiltily on the armrest of his couch. Definitely a weirder pair, with exotic birds printed  _ all  _ over them. 

“I swear I couldn’t find them, I didn't… leave them here on purpose...” He tried to clarify but Doyoung was practically seething. 

“I never wanted to hurt Mark. Why would you—”

And suddenly it clicked. 

At the first hangout, they’d been practically inseparable.

_ They must’ve been close.  _

This terrible situation was just made a million times worse.

“Donghyuck, what the  _ fuck?” _

He felt his throat begin to close from the implications of what it must've looked like. He understood now the extent of what he’d done, but he still wasn’t ready for the repercussions when he was just barely even beginning to understand it.

“You’re seriously fucked up, you know that? I never would’ve slept with you if I had known.” 

And as much as he tried to suck it up and keep it together, Hyuck rushed past him in a hurry. 

He took the stairs two at a time, wiping angrily at a few tears that fell before he could even acknowledge them. 

He’d really fucked up this time. 

And he hadn't even done it intentionally.

  
  
  


-

  
  


Donghyuck spent the following days locked away in his bedroom. He dove headfirst into his studies to keep his mind preoccupied, he stopped attending Professor Moon’s classes to avoid Mark, and he quietly finished up his assignments for the remainder of the semester to keep himself busy. 

He didn’t run into either Doyoung or Mark (thankfully) and Jungwoo would leave dinner outside his door every night to assure that he was eating well. 

Two knocks and he would slip soundlessly away into his own room. 

Jungwoo had never been a good cook, but Hyuck could tell he was trying, and it only served to make him feel even worse about burdening him lately.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  
  


He had no idea what he was doing here, his back pressed against the door like he might just run at any given moment. “You don’t… think I’m fucked up, do you?”

Professor Moon looked up from whatever he’d been typing. “Wouldn’t that make me even more fucked up?” 

“Not…” Hyuck paused. “because of that.” He didn't know what he was doing here knowing exactly where they stood now, his pride normally wouldn’t have allowed it, but he needed to talk to  _ someone _ , and for a while Taeil had become that someone he could rely on. “I hurt someone’s feelings and they told me I’m a terrible person.” He smiled bitterly, hating himself all over again. “And maybe they’re right.”

Professor Moon paused. “Why are you telling me this?” 

He considered it. “Would you still like me, knowing the things I did?”

The elder sighed, “If you want to know if I still like you, knowing you’ve made mistakes in your past, then yes.”

He realized suddenly that he’d come here because every time he was even remotely close to getting something he wanted, he sought to destroy it. If someone liked him, he’d try to find a way to change their mind, and apparently Moon Taeil was no different. 

Some sadistic part of him wanted to be right about never being good enough.

“Everyone makes bad judgment calls.” His professor glanced up at him, his reading glasses perched nicely on the tip of his nose. “You’re human too, aren’t you?”

Hyuck watched him wordlessly as he began to pack up a few of his things. It was nice, getting an outsiders insight. He wasn’t even sure if he would be in his office tonight, but he’d instinctively felt the need to try. “I wanted to take your class officially next semester but I don’t think I should.”

Professor Moon looked up for him to continue.

“Since I don’t think you’d want me in your class anymore.”

He smiled, “I miss my favorite student, but it is a little inappropriate that I have feelings for you, yes.”

_ Have.  _ The word hung heavily between them.

He hated how badly he still wanted his professor after being rejected. He hated how much he missed their casual conversations, their outings, and their inside jokes just before he’d confessed. 

“You missed the least important few of my lectures anyway,” Taeil slid the laptop into his bag, “The last few chapters in the book aren’t as introspective as the first, and I can vouch that Professor Jung’s psychology course is a lot easier to pass than mine.” He finally zipped up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. 

“I’ve always liked a challenge.”

“Last I recall, you dropped my class.”

Hyuck’s jaw dropped and Professor Moon looked quite pleased with himself by the look on his face. “Don’t  _ make _ me take your class again.” 

“Is that a threat?”

Hyuck cracked a grin. 

There was still a half smile on his face when Professor Moon finally approached him, “I can’t just stop liking you, Hyuck, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

His hand was heavy on the doorknob, “Then why do you like me?” He finally built up the courage to ask just before they walked out into the hallway together. His heart was beating wildly in his chest in both anticipation for his answer and excitement by their sudden proximity. A part of him dreaded the fact that they’d undoubtedly have to go back to being whatever they’d once been outside closed doors, but he’d settle for it if he had to. He liked him too much. 

“You’re smart, you’re funny… you think  _ entirely _ too introspectively about way too many things, and you somehow manage to make my life more interesting.” Taeil listed off with certainty. “And you’re… pretty.”

“You think I’m pretty?” Hyuck smiled, his cheeks heating. 

“I think you  _ know  _ you’re pretty.”

Hyuck laughed and Professor Moon smiled at him rather warmly.

“Why do you like me?” He asked in turn.

It was such a weird play of events, Hyuck realized. He’d come here in hopes that Moon Taeil would hate him just as much as he hated himself, and yet he’s liking him just a little bit more than he had before. “I like who I am around you.” He responded, and his Professor thankfully didn’t ask for any further explanation. He, himself, wasn’t sure what he’d meant by it, but he knew that the world felt a little more bearable, a little brighter, when they were together.

“I’ll walk you out.”

They walked together in silence, and Donghyuck knew his professor had a car parked in the opposite direction, but Taeil still walked him halfway toward his apartment complex before they finally went their separate ways.

  
  



	10. So far - Paige

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long, thank you to those of you still sticking around <3

“Hey.”

Jungwoo jumped, turning and pointing the spatula at him accusingly. He’d been cooking for the both of them when Hyuck arrived, “You scared the crap out of me…” he clutched at his chest with a sigh.

“Sorry.”

The elder turned back to attending the fish, “Are you hungry? I think I'm finally getting the hang of cooking.”

Hyuck hummed in both acknowledgment and agreement, because Jungwoo  _ was  _ noticably getting better. (And he was starving.)

“How are you feeling?’

“Better, I think.” he sighed.

“That’s good.”

The sizzling of the frying fish filled the silence between them.

“Does Doyoung hate you now too?” he had to ask.

Jungwoo looked up and pursed his lips in thought, “He was definitely upset when he found out I knew… but it’s fine. It wasn’t my place to tell him about your personal life.”

Hyuck hiked himself up onto the counter and stared down into his lap.

“Hyuckie, it was none of his business.” 

“I kind of made it his business,” He reminded him, “And I fucked up your friendship

“It’s fine Hyuck, I care more about you anyway.”

  
  


-

  
  


Hyuck watched Jungwoo eat.

“What?” His roommate muttered through a mouthful, “I feel like you’re judging me, Hyuckie, you know I always eat like this.”

And Hyuck laughed because Jungwoo  _ did  _ always eat like a starving man, “I was just thinking.” he looked back down at his plate, “But what if I transfer?”

Jungwoo froze and immediately stared up at him, “What?”

He’d been thinking about it for a while now, but this was the first time he'd actually sait it out loud. “I messed up pretty badly this time, Hyung.” He bit down on his lower lip, unable to look up at him. He didn't know exactly how much Jungwoo knew, knowing he wasn't the type to pry, but Doyoung must've told him  _ something.  _ “Doyoung Hyung and I slept together that night and Mark found out and they’re really close.” He finally confessed, “I swear I didn’t know. But Doyoung was really mad, Hyung. He didn’t believe me. Hyung I—don’t think he’s ever going to forgive me for what I did.”

Jungwoo didn’t know what to say, judging by the look on his face, but he looked just as heartbroken as Hyuck expected he’d be. He reached over and took his hand. “I believe you.”

Hyuck averted his gaze in embarrassment. 

“If there was anything I could do to change your mind about leaving... you know I would do it.”

Hyuck nodded. But this was his decision to make. “And you could finally live with Lucas if I left.”

Jungwoos brows furrowed.

“You worry about me too much, Hyung, it’s not fair to you.”

”I worry about you because I care about you.” he tightened his grip on his hand, “If I wanted to live with Lucas I would have done it already, but I’m comfortable here and I’m happy with the pace of our relationship. If he’s serious about me, he’ll wait. But I don’t want you to go.” He shook his head, “And Doyoung... he’s very protective of those he cares about. Talk to Mark, Hyuckie.” 

He should. He should really talk to Mark.

“Promise me you’ll consider talking to him before you decide.”

“I will.”

Jungwoo smiled and stood up, walking around to hug him from behind. “Don’t go far if you leave. I’d miss you too much.”

Hyuck huffed another laugh, trying to hide the fact that he was choked up by the affection as Jungwoo pressed a kiss to his cheek. 

“I don’t want you to go.”

_ And he didn’t really want to leave. _

“I don’t think you need Doyoung to forgive you. I think you need to figure things out and find a way to forgive yourself.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


He finally built up the courage to text Mark later that night and he immediately agreed to meet him the following day after his morning classes. 

The hours before Mark showed up to his apartment were spent going over every possible scenario in his mind. He ultimately came to the conclusion that Mark was definitely going to punch him, but it would be worth it. He was more than ready for a broken nose, but Mark showed up looking just as nervous as he was.

They were both distantly awkward at first, sitting a safe distance apart on his bed, both unsure of where to start. 

“I don’t hate you.” Mark started.

And Hyuck wanted to look up from his lap, but he simply couldn’t bring himself to do so. “You really should.” He laughed bitterly. It would be a hell of a lot easier if he did. 

“But you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Shut up.” Hyuck cringed as the harsh words left his lips, “Yes I did.”

“We weren’t _dating_ Hyuck, I wasn’t mad at you. I was hurt that you slept with my best friend, I guess. But I didn't… I didn’t hate you. Doyoung Hyung… he was just really angry when he found out, but you could’ve told me _._ ”

Maybe he’d misjudged Mark, Hyuck realized, a _lot_. This just proved he’d been more in his head about the whole situation than he realized. _God,_ he was crying now. This was probably the most crying he’d ever done in his lifetime. It was angry and messy, but he couldn’t stop the tears from slipping down his cheeks _._ “You’re too nice, you know that?” He wiped at his face with the sleeves of his oversized hoodie and waited for Mark’s response. “Just admit that I hurt your feelings and punch me already.”

Mark laughed, in that loud and obnoxious way he always did. “We made a promise, remember?”

Hyuck’s shoulders were beginning to shake as he covered his face with both hands. He was such an idiot, such an asshole. He couldn’t speak. He could hardly even breathe.

Mark tentatively moved closer and wrapped both arms around him. 

“Who knew you were such a crybaby.” Mark muttered into his shoulder and Hyuck huffed, bitterly swatting at his arm. They stayed that way until he’d calmed down enough to speak again. “I’ll talk to Doyoung.” Mark promised.

“Don’t. Seriously, I don’t deserve that.” He muttered, his voice rough, “I didn’t know you guys were close, Mark.”

He shrugged, “It’s fine.”

“It's not fine.” he muttered into the silence, “And I’m sorry. I really should’ve just talked to you but I didn’t want it to be  _ weird, _ and I made things worse.”

“I already forgave you, man.”

“I swear I’m not usually this much of a crybaby.”

“Sure.” Mark muttered sarcastically.

Hyuck shoved his shoulder again. 

“Does this mean we can go back to being friends? Because I miss stealing your pudding cups.”

“That was you?” He pushed him away in disbelief, “And this whole time I thought it was Lucas.”

Mark was truly unphased by what happened after that day. He never brought it up or held it against Hyuck and they  _ easily  _ went back to being just friends. His priority was still school, since he ultimately struggled more than Hyuck did academically and finals were quickly approaching, but they went back to hanging out every so often and things were never truly awkward between them as he’d imagined they would be. 

Hyuck was relieved, to say the least, and it was reason enough to change his mind about transferring. 

Jungwoo was thrilled to hear it. 

And he figured there was no harm in attending Professor Moon’s class again. 

He’d shown up fairly early to claim his original seat beside Mark and Professor Moon paused when he noticed him. He tried not to think about how  _ good _ it felt to be acknowledged or how the smile he shot his way was enough to make his day. 

He’d missed his lectures. 

“It was nice having you back.” His Professor acknowledged him as he approached the podium after class. 

“You missed seeing my pretty face in the crowd?”

Taeils cheeks flushed, but other than a tight lipped smile, he continued to pack up his things. 

“My next class was cancelled. If you’re not doing anything I thought maybe we could go for coffee?”

“I actually have some emails to sort though, but you’re welcome to join me.” 

Hyuck pretended to be dissapointed but easily agreed, following him out toward his office. 

And as soon as the door shut behind them, he felt his heart begin to race. “You know, I looked it up and there’s no rule explicitly stating you can’t date a student. And I’m not  _ technically  _ your student.”

Taeil turned back to face him in the entryway of his office. It suddenly felt a million times smaller with less distance between them, “You always do your research.” He huffed a laugh in amusement

“If you like me, and I like you, I don’t really see the problem.” Hyuck tried to smile like his nerves weren’t currrntly tearing away at his insides. 

“I just don’t want you to… regret this.”

“I won’t.”

Moon Taeil looked away in silent contemplation. 

“If this is about the age gap, I’ve dated enough already and I’m serious this time. We’re not  _ that  _ far apart in age, hyung. I don’t just like you because I’m attracted to you, I like you because you understand me. We’re always on the same page and you aren’t annoyed by my teasing and you remind me that no matter how many times I tell myself I’m too much, there’s someone out there who can handle me. Unless… you  _ do _ think I’m too much.”

Taeil smiled up at him softly, “You're definitely too much.” And the fondness in his tone made Hyucks heart skip. 

“Tell me you don’t want to try and I’ll drop it.” He muttered in a low voice, a big part of him still terrified of being rejected. “Say it and I’ll go.”

He didn’t want to go, and Hyuck could tell by the look in his eyes that neither did he. Moon Taeil was good at a  _ lot  _ of things, but hiding his emotions definitely wasn’t one of them. 

“You said you couldn’t  _ just _ get over me. I’m saying, you don’t have to.” Hyuck bit down on his lower lip to keep his nerves in check and Taeil was the one to reach out and cup his cheek.

“Only if you’re serious.”

“I’m really serious.” He began to smile, leaning into his professor's touch. There was something different about being desired romantically that made everything feel so much more intimate. Even his gentle touch felt like a confession. 

Taeil leant in to close the distance between them and paused, their lips just barely touched before he moved away, “What if you do end up regretting it?”

“When have I ever  _ not  _ told you exactly how I’m feeling?”

“You have a point,” he grinned, “What are you feeling now?”

“Like... I really want you to kiss me.”

“That’s not a feeling!” Taeil chuckled.

“Well, I’m feeling it.” Hyuck justified with a shrug and leant up to kiss him, bringing one of his hands up and tentatively setting it at the base of Taeil’s neck.

“Can I take you to dinner before we go any further?” He muttered against his lips.

“Yes. But I really want you to kiss me more before my next class.”

“I guess I can wait on those emails.”

Donghyuck smiled against his lips when they kissed again and pulled him closer. Taeil kissed him sweetly against the door, locking it behind them. 

“How much time do we have?”

“A little under half an hour.”

More than enough time to familiarize himself with his Hyung’s gentle touch and the soft press of his lips. 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter will be the last <3


	11. Butterfly - UMI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm DEVASTATED (smut ahead)

“Are you sure about this?”

Donghyuck had been wondering the same thing, overcome with desire suddenly for his Hyung. Would it be too soon? How soon was too soon when they'd been dancing around each other for so long? “Are _you_ sure?” he asked him back. 

Taeil had the audacity to grin, “Yes. But I don't want to go too far if you're not ready.”

“I'm ready,” he assured him. 

Taeil tightened his grip on Hyuck’s waist.

He bit down on his lower lip and smiled down at him softly, “If you're waiting for my consent you already have it.” He leant down and pressed a fleeting kiss to Taeil's waiting lips. He'd never been so nervous when seducing someone before, if he could even consider this that. It felt different somehow. He could feel the anxiety fluttering around his chest at the thought of finally taking things a step further. “Is this okay with you?” He asked, their noses brushing and his warm breath against his lips. He wanted him so badly that he feared he wouldn’t be able to stop himself now if he tried. They didn't sleep together after dinner the first night or the second night, and he'd been craving his touch ever since the evening they’d kissed in his office.

Taeil nodded and pulled him into another gentle kiss, hesitantly pulling him closer.

He felt a lot hotter suddenly, pulling away to slip his shirt off, getting more comfortable in his lap.

“Should we move to my bed?”

“Should we?” Hyuck _definitely_ couldn't stop himself now, grinding down against the noticeable bulge in Taeil’s jeans. He found that as much as he enjoyed the way he dressed up for every lecture, he loved him just as much like this, in sweats and oversized tee shirts. He was just as appealing in his casual attire, if not more so. 

Taeil's eyes wandered and Hyuck took his hand, trailing it up his side and guiding it slowly back down to rest on the lower part of his abdomen. “Trust me,” he slipped his own hand beneath the elders shirt and ran it up the warmth of his chest. “I want this just as much as you do.” He assured, leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to his jaw, hoping his serious tone conveyed the truth behind his statement. He'd been so careful with Donghyuck before now. He no longer craved anyone else's touch.

Taeil's free hand came up to pull him down from behind his neck and they kissed again, this time their tongues clashing and swirling until Taeil ultimately won their running battle for dominance. 

“Do you want me to ride you?” He muttered against his lips and something lit a fire within his Hyung, his hand reaching back to grip at his ass suddenly, lifting himself to grind up into the younger. 

“ _Fuck,”_ Donghyuck moaned as they rutted against each other for friction. He whimpered, his head falling back. “Take me to bed.” He begged him, grasping at Taeil's t-shirt, balling his fists in the fabric.

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


He relished in the comfort of finally being in Taeil’s bed, slipping out of his jeans and moaning when his hyung carefully slipped his fingers beneath the waistband of his boxers, pulling them off him with care. 

“ _Please…_ ” he whimpered, and Taeil finally stripped from his own clothes, discarding his shirt and leaning over to press careful kisses to Hyucks neck, then collarbone, trailing them further and further down toward his overly sensitive nipples.

Taeil was so much better in bed than he'd been expecting. He was almost painstakingly cautious, especially when it came to working him open, making sure he was comfortable enough for another finger until he was desperate for more, the filthy slide off his fingers and Hyuck’s lewd whimpers filling the silence of his apartment. 

“I'm ready…” He assured again, tears pricking at his eyes from how _good_ Taeil was at massaging his prostate. He couldn’t take much more of it. “ _Please_...”

Taeil finally slipped out of his boxers and slid a hand up the younger’s side as he readied himself, sliding a condom on and stroking his length with extra lube for good measure, groaning when he finally pressed against his entrance.

“I’m ready, Hyung.” He assured, and Taeil interlaced their fingers, setting their joined hands Hyuck‘s head as he slipped inside, a collective moan leaving both of them as he blissfully bottomed out. 

“Are you okay?”

Hyuck nodded as Taeil leant over to press tender kisses to his cheek, kissing away the salty tears that formed at the corners of his eyes till his breathing wasn’t so labored. 

“Are you sure?”

Hyuck linked his ankles behind his back and encouraged him to keep going by threading his fingers through the hair at the nape of Taeils neck, “I’m positive… Hyungie… _please_.”

Taeil obliged but started them off slow, pulling out only to sink back into him as Hyuck accommodated to his length. 

“ _Harder_...” he encouraged, as Taeil’s shallow strokes became more purposeful. They built up a steady rhythm between them and Hyuck had never felt so cared for, so loved beneath his hyung’s gaze that he could’ve cried. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“So… are you officially my boyfriend now?” Hyuck was curled up against his side, his head resting on Taeils shoulder.

“I’d hope so.” The elder smiled though his eyes were closed, his cheeks flushing the lightest shade of pink. 

Hyuck reached over and took his free hand, idly interlacing their fingers. “Does it bother you that I’m so clingy?”

Taeil shook his head, “Of course not,” leaning over to press a kiss to the crown of his head. “It’s cute.”

“You think I’m cute.” He smiled smugly to himself. He could get used to the compliments and the way he always reciprocated his cuddling. “Thank you for dinner, and…” he pressed a kiss to his chest, “for after.” 

Taeil ran a hand soothingly up his back as they both collectively battled their exhaustion. “And thank you for being patient with me.” Taeil responded, his voice tired. 

Hyuck would’ve waited a _hell_ of a lot longer for this. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


The summer flew by in a wave of manageable classes, questionable dates, and a whole lot of feelings. 

Taeil was a lot more romantic than he’d initially let on, (and he _cooked_ , who knew? Just when Hyuck was beginning to get used to Jungwoo’s amature cooking too...) and a majority of their dates were fit late into the evening, after he finished up with his coursework and Taeil finished grading papers and responding to emails. 

They did little besides eat, watch movies, and fall asleep together on the couch, (on the nights that they were too exhausted to do much else) but it was more than enough for the both of them, and he was beginning to leave his apartment a lot more often than Jungwoo did.

After that particularly haunting fiasco where his roommate walked in on the two of them a few weeks ago, they’d been reluctant to try again, and the last thing he wanted to do was introduce them, but Jungwoo was very obviously concerned about his whereabouts, and as much as he tried not to pry, he was clearly worried about him. 

Thankfully, Jungwoo had never taken his class. 

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“We don’t have to do this.” He tried to backtrack. 

“But it’s important to you.” Taeil smiled down at him reassuringly, and it was, but Hyuck couldn’t help the anxiety that came with the thought of someone else knowing about their relationship, even if that someone was Jungwoo. For the longest time it felt like their little secret, and a part of him hoped that it would stay that way until graduation. 

They’d talked about going public before in passing. Taeil was fleetingly vocal about how he didn’t _mind_ but he was just as nervous about the public’s reception of their relationship. It could possibly get him fired, in Hyuck’s worst case scenario, and even in the _best_ case scenario, he didn’t want others turning against Taeil or looking down on him when he’d worked so hard to get where he was now. The last thing he wanted was to turn people against Taeil when he was so passionate about what he did. 

“I trust you. And if you trust him, we’ll be fine.” He had his arms around Hyuck’s waist, one of his hands coming up to cup the younger’s cheek, gently stroking at his jaw with the pad of his thumb. 

Hyuck got restless when he was nervous, and Taeil found that the best way to keep him calm was to hold him steady. 

“I just don’t want you to get in trouble.”

“You said it yourself, there are no rules against it.”

“But if your students find out they might start rumors and I don’t want that.” Hyuck averted his gaze, resisting the urge to fidget with his hands by slipping them into Taeil’s back pockets. He figured now was as good a time as any to talk about this. 

“We’re not obvious in public. Don’t worry.”

Hyuck sighed, knowing Taeil was right but feeling guilty regardless. 

“It’s going to be fine.” Taeil kissed his temple and he exhaled softly. They couldn’t keep it a secret forever. He was already iching to talk about his boyfriend with Jungwoo, but it didn’t feel right before introducing them. He wanted his roommate to know that he was serious about him, and Taeil was surprisingly very open to the idea of meeting him. 

Clearly. 

“Okay.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


“What?” Jungwoos eyes were comically wide.

“My boyfriend.” He repeated. 

Jungwoo smiled tightly up at Taeil who was currently sitting across from him stiffly at Donghyuck’s side. He’d told his roommate that he wanted to introduce him to someone, and he maybe had his suspicions of it being whoever he was currently sleeping with, but he hadn’t been expecting _this_. “It’s nice to meet you.” He bowed at the elder who bowed back respectfully. 

“Moon Taeil.”

“Kim Jungwoo.”

Hyuck smiled nervously and squeezed Tails hand beneath the table, “He teaches that one sociology class I talked about.”

And at that, Jungwoo’s expression shifted and his jaw dropped in a mixture of both shock and confusion. _“Oh.”_

He’d thought of a million different ways to break it to him, but a bigger part of him really wanted to see his roommate’s genuine reaction to the situation. 

He chuckled at the look of realization on his face.

Taeil looked like he was trying hard not to react beside him, but Hyuck could feel him physically tense up in his seat. 

“How long have you guys been… dating.”

“About four months now.” He answered easily. 

Jungwoo’s eyes widened further if possible. 

“I wanted to tell you.” 

But Jungwoo understood. He could tell in the way his expression softened around the edges. “I’m happy for you two.” And he meant it. 

They ate in comfortable silence at first, with Jungwoo trying not to swallow his plate out of respect for Taeil and Hyuck pulling both of them into a casual conversation about the coming fall semester and things went smoothly from there. 

But Jungwoo waited till Taeil was gone to ask what was truly on his mind. “He’s your—professor.“

“Yeah… but I _technically_ didn’t take his class. Does that count?”

“I think it counts.”

Hyuck laughed. 

Jungwoo was smiling but his eyes were sincere in a careful way that Donghyuck understood the meaning of entirely. 

“It’s not like that. I’m serious about him, hyung.”

Jungwoo nodded, “Then I’m happy for you. Just be careful.”

  
  
  


-

  
  
  


Three months of monogamy had been the longest running relationship Hyuck had ever had. It was back in high school, and he would consider breaking up with him so often that he began to believe it was normal. But dating Taeil had made him realize that it was _far_ from normal. 

For a while he feared that Taeil was waiting to break things off in the fall, but the closer they got to the fall semester, the more reluctant they became to leave each other. The short walk to the bus stop seemed like too much of a hassle when their time together was already running short.

Taeil would hold him late into the night and ask him to stay more often than not.

He would come over, even on short notice, and they would spend their evenings together.

The fall would bring an even bigger workload and more responsibilities, so the least they could do was take advantage of the freedom they had now. 

After months of seeing each other, Taeil knew exactly where Hyuck liked to be touched, just how he liked to be teased, and how he’d ultimately beg to be fucked.

“I can’t concentrate with you on my desk.” Taeil was writing a recommendation letter by hand, flipping through his students folder full of accomplishments before sitting back with a sigh.

“That’s unfortunate.” Hyuck was messing around on his phone, his ankles crossed. “I’m kidding.” He finally looked up at him with an apologetic grin, “Should I move?”

Taeil shook his head, running one of his hands up the younger’s thigh. “Can I take these off?”

Hyuck set his phone down and nodded eagerly at the development, lifting himself up to aid Taeil in sliding off both his pants and boxers at an agonizingly slow pace, kicking his shoes off in the process. 

He sighed, bracing his arms behind himself and arching when Taeil stroked him a few times before releasing him to pack up his paperwork.

He scooted further back onto the desk, hissing at the cold and lifted his legs up to spread himself further. 

“Fuck,” Taeil sighed at the sight of him. 

Donghyuk’s breathing labored when Taeil ghosted his fingertips over the head of his cock, trailing them up and down his length to get the desired reaction out of him. Hyuck’s mouth fell open and his eyes screwed shut, his body tensing and trembling at the featherlight touch. “Ahh—“ he moaned, his thighs twitching.

“You like watching me work, Hyuckie?”

The younger nodded.

“I like seeing you spread like this for me.”

He jerked when Taeil ran his thumb over the head of his cock, spitting into his hand before finally beginning to stoke him. It was such a filthy scene that Donghyuck’s entire body convulsed as he moaned, dropping his head back in please. 

“Watch me.”

He snapped his head back up immediately in obedience, their gazes locking. They’d never had sex in his office before, and although the campus was empty, he was already hard beneath his palm.

“Can you remove your shirt for me?”

Hyuck straightened up to slip his shirt off and whimpered as Taeil’s hand stroked him fast enough to have him arching, only to release him again, running his fingers up and down his length in the same teasing, gentle motions. “F-Fuck,” He was grinning from the indescribable waves of pleasure that wracked through him.

Taeil could have him cum like this if he wanted to. If he was generous. 

“You looked so tempting, sitting up on my desk like that.”

Hyuck screwed his eyes shut as his hyung’s fingers trailed further south, thumb ghosting over his entrance before trailing back to his tip. 

_“Ahh—Hyung-“_ he gasped, his chest rising and falling from the over sensitivity of his member in its current state. 

“You’re already leaking, Hyuckie.”

Precum dripped onto his stomach and Taeil swiped it up with two fingers, pressing them teasingly against his entrance, circling the ring of muscle there but not pressing any further inside. 

“You know I don’t like oral.” Taeil reached up to stroke his length with his free hand, and it was true his hyung wasn’t a fan of taking him in his mouth, but he leaned in and ran his tongue over the head of his cock and he came right there in his palm.

“ _Hyung!” He cried_ , his body tensing and flooding with pleasure as strings of white shot onto Taeil’s waiting cheek.

He bit down on his lower lip, hard enough to draw blood as the second wave of pleasure relaxed and then seized his body all over again, his thighs trembling from the force of his orgasm. 

For a moment, he couldn’t move and Taeil allowed him the time to recollect himself. 

“ _Woah…_ ” he said in a quiet voice, wanting nothing more than to lay back and relax into this feeling, rendered immobile, his limbs feeling entirely useless. “Let’s go again.”

Taeil laughed, his eyes gleaming with love and adoration for the younger, “Are you _sure_? That was a lot.”

“I want you inside me.” He insisted, his head spinning from endorphins. He wanted to feel it again. The slow building of pleasure, the slow slide of his Hyung’s fingers. He could handle it. He knew that well enough. 

“You’re so good.” Taeil patted his thigh and wiped at his face with the tissue he’d gotten from a cabinet within his desk.

“Come on, I’m sure you have to have like, gallons of lube in there.” He reclined to lean back on his elbows.

Taeil laughed again and indulged him, pulling out a tiny bottle he kept in his bag. “If you’re sure.”

“I've never been more sure in my _life.”_

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm honestly sad this is over. I get so attached and the story might've ended a little differently than the first chapter might've insinuated (as far as their relationship goes) but I really wanted them to have a steady growing and healthy relationship. I've never written and COMPLETED a chaptered fic but here's to hoping ill get better at it in the future. Thank you for sticking around <3 ill definitely be writing more soon

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on twt [@kwanspoonyoung](https://twitter.com/kwanspoonyoung)


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